Between dealing with kids, dealing with work, and dealing with Take Your Kids to Work Day, you may have missed some of the most insane things celebrities did this week. Well, have no fear — because Kashmere is here with his finger on the pulse and his eyes on every Instagram account of anyone worth talking about. From Oscar winners to reality TV royalty, to even actually royalty; here are the craziest stories going on this week. Welcome to our newest series, “Did You Hear? With Kashmere!”
Kashmere (also known as Danny Murphy) is a comedian, writer, and pop culture connoisseur (despite not really knowing how to spell connoisseur). He currently writes for Betches and Marie Claire and has also been featured in Glamour, Seventeen and Town & Country. When he’s not drinking red wine or iced coffee while watching Bravo, he’s performing around New York and hosting PASS THE AUX at The Stonewall Inn and DO I SEND IT? at Branded Saloon. Follow his fake reality show AKA his Instagram stories, @kashmeredanny.
How did another year go by where I wasn’t paid to go to Coachella? It’s just like, what does Vanessa Hudgens have that I don’t? Don’t answer that. Regardless, despite being many miles away from the desert festival I still had my sources to hear about everything that went down there… and by my sources, I mean Instagram. Let’s break it down and see which famous rap star is probably breaking down right now (hint: they got that Super Bass).
Ariana Grande Brought Out NYSNC At Coachella. Ariana Grande made history as the youngest headliner ever at Coachella last night, and one of the few women to do so. I guess she wants to add philanthropist to her resume under singer/songwriter/actress, because our favorite Starbucks drink brought out an aging boyband sans their breakout star (Justin Timberlake was finishing up his tour for that album no one bought or listened to) to do one and a half songs. That’s right, the other Backstreets back, all right! I’d be lying if I said I didn’t SCREAM the words to ‘Tearing Up My Heart’ at 2:00 AM while watching the live stream, though. I’m mainly just happy that Lance Bass has something to talk about at brunch today. Here’s more.
Nicki Minaj Suffers MAJOR Sound Issues At Surprise Performance. Nicki! No! Can I be the first to say, I’m sorry girl. You know I’m rooting for you. Hell, I’m planning on seeing you on tour this year when you release tickets despite how many shows you’ve cancelled on your European leg. Obviously, Ariana is also rooting for one of her best friends in the industry: because she brought her out during her headlining Coachella set. This is a major ‘I Got You Babe,’ moment: because Nicki really needs the good press and a solid performance right now. All of her hits with Ariana are classics that people love, but unfortunately… the sound engineers at Coachella are Team Cardi B: because they left Nicki with an ear piece that didn’t work so she couldn’t hear the backing track. Cut to? What you see at 2 AM when you go to Karaoke in Hell’s Kitchen. Praying for you, Minaj. Teen Vogue has the whole story.
Jordyn Woods Is Having A More Awkward Weekend Than You. Jordyn flew in from London to Coachella, cause sometimes an influencer will sacrifice waking up for a red eye to take pictures with makeup products in the sand. It turns out, she might have been better off just watching The Crown in her new London flat. First, she awkwardly ran into Hailey Baldwin-Bieber, who’s best friends with Kendall Jenner. BB (Baldwin-Bieber, because we’re close) gave her the cold shoulder while greeting Jordyn’s friend Jaden Smith. It gets worse: then, at Jaden’s party, Kylie and her friends are seated next to Jordyn and they ice her out until they leave. The moral of the story? All of these people are under the age of 25 and richer than all of us. Cosmo has more.
Childish Gambino AirDropped People New Shoes. If you’ve ever randomly been sent an AirDrop from an unknown number, it was most likely a dick pic on the train or a meme from 2015 that people think its funny to send to strangers (it’s not). But, hopefully if you went to Coachella, all of your previous issues with the feature didn’t sway you to deactivate it: because rapper/actor/comedian Childish Gambino (also known as Donald Glover) gave a free pair of his Adidas collab to anyone who accepted his AirDrop of the shoes. Sorry Android uses. Get more at mashable.
Katy Perry and Orlando Bloom Got Hot and Heavy. Katy Perry may not be having luck getting a new single on the radio this past year, but at least she can take comfort knowing that she may never be single herself again. Her previously on-again-off-again relationship with Orlando Bloom has been full speed ahead, with an engagement and a ton of social media loving. Some (me) would say perhaps too much social media loving. They took their PDA to IRL territory at Coachella, where Katy was doing a guest spot at Zedd’s show. It doesn’t matter that she only sang one song, cause this steamy make out picture definitely made her a headliner in the press. I’m SO hear for this relationship, mainly because these two were in two of my favorite movies: Elizabethtown and the Katy Perry: Part of Me tour documentary (I’ve cried every time I’ve watched it). Also, never forget their paddle boarding pictures seen around the world. Go to Cosmo to go deeper.
And that’s all I heard this week, but both my ears and my bottle of wine are open, so start emotionally preparing for next week’s round up and of course — if you see something, say something, and tweet me at @kashmeredanny.
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Experience life in the FAB lane. He's fashion forward and knows his way around the red carpets of comedy. It's Kashmir