Remembering Sara Dahms, A Rare Light in Dark Places

Donate to a Gofundme set up for Sara’s children.

If you regularly read this website, or regularly go to comedy festivals, clubs in New York or Chicago, or special events around the world, you may have shared space with Sara Dahms who also went by the name Sara From Chicago. She was comedy’s biggest fan. You would hear her laughing, see her dancing at all the after parties, maybe catch her scribbling some notes. She talked with everyone- made friends with everyone she met- saw the good in all who she encountered. And she wrote about comedy, sharing her love of stand up with others.

Sara passed away this Sunday at the age of 41, far too young for anyone, particularly someone who enjoyed life as much as she did. Some of you may have been aware she had a rare heart disease, called Kawasaki syndrome. She didn’t talk about it much, because she didn’t want people to treat her differently or think about her as fragile. But occasionally she would share the story about her near death, or more accurately, actual death experience over three decades ago. Her condition required multiple surgeries throughout her life, but the big one, as she described it to me, happened when she was four years old. “That surgery lasted 21 hours and I had a heart attack on the table and actually died. They were able to bring me back and keep me alive on the heart and lung machine but due to the heart attack I lost all of my heart function and kept flat lining every time they tried to take me off of the machine.” If her condition didn’t improve they were going to have to let her go. But Sara fought her way back, although she would need surgeries throughout her life. She had her heart valves replaced at the age of 11, and a defibrillator helped maintain her rhythms later on. Her brother Angelo told us, “she knew she was on borrowed time. Comedy lit a fire of happiness into her soul and provided the perfect spark of happiness into her life,” he wrote. “Unfortunately, her heart gave out and they just couldn’t save her.”

Five years ago in early 2017, Sara met radio host and comedian Ron Bennington in a comedy club and immediately made an impression on him. He told me he had just met this really great person, and that I had to meet her. He said that she and I shared a love of comedy and we might work well together. We hit it off instantly, and Sara told me she would love to write about comedy for The Interrobang.  A few days later, she had a column, Notes From a Comedy Junkie, and her first post, A Chicago Fan Takes a Comedy-cation in New York.

Here in her own words, was her introduction to the internet.

I like to fancy myself a “comedynerd.” My love of comedy is something that I inherited from my mother. I was raised on National Lampoons, John Hugh’s, and Gene Wilder. In addition to movies, Shelley Duvall and her series, “Fairy Tale Theater” brought all of the leading comedians of the time into my life through the live action production of all my favorite, childhood stories. As I grew, movies, muppets, Kelly Lebrock and PeeWee Herman continued to fuel my love of comedy. Who would imagine that there could be anymore to life than this?

Then, on one particular day in 1988, my older sister was watching a program that was not quite a movie, not quite a television show….. It was a lone, black man in a purple suit, just standing there, talking. This solo man holding a mic was Eddie Murphy and the program on our TV was his comedy special, “Raw.” This comedy was pure and had no plot or character development to get in it’s way. I LOVED it! The next standup comedian I discovered was Andrew “Dice” Clay. The cadence of Clay’s delivery, combined with his over ripened machismo, and I was sold. Stand up comedy was my new favorite form of entertainment.

My affinity for comedy has always been a significant part of my personality. I am not a comedian, only a fan who made the decision to no longer sit idly by and adore this art form from afar. 18 months ago I decided to book an adventure to see a show and take part within a culture outside of the life I had always known. My first comedycation was a trip to see Jeff Ross play in Miami on my birthday. I had so much fun on this trip, that I decided not to stop there. As a result, I have seen shows, attended parties, made friends, and created memories I never would have imagined possible. Life is meant to be lived. Make it a good one!

My goal for the contributions I make to the site will be to bring fans of comedy together and make recommendations and reviews from a ‘face in the crowd’ perspective.

Sara wrote for The Interrobang for five years and never ceased to amaze me with her ability to connect with people.  She went to every festival, and would meet people– other fans, yes, but she would also instantly connect with comedians and find her way to industry people without even knowing they were industry people. During the time I knew her, she attended and reviewed about two dozen festivals, every moment full of enthusiasm as if it was her first. She went to Oddball Comedy Tour, Comedy Central’s Clusterfest, Moontower, Skankfest, Just for Laughs, Dave Chappelle’s Comedy Camp, some of them annually, and if there was something happening in St Louis, she went. If three of her favorite comics played in Detroit (Robert Kelly, Big Jay, Ari Shaffir just last month), she went, if a comedian friend was in town, she’d hang with them all weekend (recently Aaron Berg). And she supported the shit out of all of the comedians, literally celebrating their successes as if they were her own. I remember when she sent me a video from Clusterfest showing me how long the line was for Big Jay’s show, and she was glowing with pride as she ran up and down cheering..

And she LOVED what she did, every minute of it. In her “Comedy Junkie” column, she would eventually write about over 500 comedians, seeing many of them multiple times, writing about their stand up, their podcasts, their tours.  She loved all types of comedy but her first love was darker humor. She was crazy about Louis C.K. and Dave Chappelle.  She loved Big Jay Oakerson, Ron Bennington, Chris Rock, Esther Ku, Dave Attell, Jessica Kirson, Dan Soder, Jeffrey Ross, Robert Kelly, Ari Shaffir, Wil Sylvince,  Adrienne Iapalucci, Shane Gillis, Colin Quinn, Donnell Rawlings, Yamaneika Saunders, Mark Normand, Joe List, Sam Morril, Joe Machi, Anthony Jeselnik, Sal Vulcano, Marina Franklin–  these were just a short list of some of her favorites, and they were people who she eventually considered friends, and most of them felt the same about her.  There were so many more but I tried to just grab a few from some of our conversations that I could remember-I know she would hate to leave anyone out.  She loved radio and podcasts- the Howard Stern Show, Ron and Fez and Bennington, Unmasked, The Bonfire, YKWD, Tuesdays With Stories, Opie and Anthony, Kill Tony, Misery Loves Company, SDR, Legion of Skanks and so many more.

Sara hated cancel culture and her most recent feature (and very first opinion piece) was a loud rebuke of the retribution being thrown at performers who were true artists and creators, through the examples of Chappelle, Rogan and Kanye:  Dave Chappelle, Joe Rogan & Ye Create Culture and THAT Cannot be Cancelled.

If you never met Sara, she had an energy that was irresistibly positive and joyful.  She loved to dance, and laugh, and loved people. She loved learning about them, and she really listened when others talked. She would hear about a special event, or a festival and jump on a plane by herself, and join the fun. She was never alone for long, she made friends instantly.  And everybody loved her! I remember calling up Colleen McGarr and Lietza Brass at Moontower to tell them all about Sara, and that she would be coming down to write about the festival- could we arrange a media pass for her?  “Sara? From Chicago? of course we know Sara, we love her!”

Sara was always grateful for being welcomed into this oddball world.  “It is nice to know that there are many ways I can contribute to the art I love so much, even if I’m not a comic myself. Thank you for everything,” she would say, and when I would tell her that we are the ones who should be thanking her, she would blush and deflect and then coyly say “really!?!?!?!?” like she couldn’t believe her luck. She never believed me when I told her how unique and rare her experiences were. “Sara,” I would tell her, “this doesn’t happen to other people. Others aren’t embraced over and over again the way you are. You’re special.”  I remember when she told me how excited she was that she met Tony Hinchcliffe, her first interview, and that he was willing to talk with her.  That was the first of over sixty interviews that she would do for the site, an impressive list that included Tom Segura, Ms. Pat, Maria Bamford, Jeff Garlin, Dr. Katz, Patton Oswalt, Nate Bargatze and so many more. When she met Louis C.K. she described every second of the short interaction to me, like she might burst. She even suggested a tag to one of his jokes in her quick 3 minute conversation- who could pull that off?   She told me he laughed and said “that’s a good one!”

Moments like these were not rare.  Sara just had this incredible effect on people. She met Donnell Rawlings on the last night at JFL in 2017, got into a deep conversation about life and comedy. A few weeks later, he invited her to come see Dave Chappelle at Radio City.  She was floored. “Um, what?!?! Come again?!? Wild horses couldn’t stop me!” she said as she booked a flight to New York City. She not only went to the show, she went to the after party and then the after-after party where she danced in the super secret club till 3am before heading off to her favorite post comedy ritual- a Reuben sandwich at Sarge’s Deli.

Sara loved all the clubs and they all loved her.  She was a regular at Zanies and all the Chicago clubs and bar shows, as well as The Stand, The Comedy Cellar, Stand Up New York, and probably more, but those are the ones I know about.   She formed a friendship with the club owners, like Patrick Milligan, who would sometimes even give Sara a heads up if there was something special happening. Who wouldn’t want Sara’s smiling laughing magnetic face sitting in their front row?

She was so fearless, most people would be terrified to take a plane to a place they had never been, and jump right into a scene, but she did it all the time. Even red carpets! Working a red carpet is tough. You don’t have much time, you have to fight to get to talk with the good celebs, and you generally don’t know who you are going to get to talk with ahead of time, especially when you’re with a small niche outlet like the Interrobang.  But when I asked Sara one day if she wanted to give it a shot, she didn’t hesitate. Sara worked two red carpets for the Just for Laughs awards shows, The Bruce Willis Comedy Central Roast, the Alec Baldwin Comedy Central Roast, and the Mark Twain Award for Julia Louis Dreyfus at the Kennedy Center. Last week we were discussing Sara taking a trip to DC later this month to grace the red carpet at the Mark Twain Award for Jon Stewart. She was amazing. She spoke to Seinfeld, Tony Hale, and Julia Louis Dreyfuss, bonded with Tiffany Haddish, laughed with Kevin Hart, chatted with Dave Chappelle, and Howie Mandel, Jim Jefferies and Chris Redd, Nikki Glaser and Pete Lee.

I remember when she told me she met Zoe Friedman, lifelong comedy producer and co-founder of Comedy Gives Back. They met at Just For Laughs and bonded over their mutual love of comedy and dancing.  Zoe introduced her to Emile Laford who helps run the Comedy Store, and before long, Sara was conquering the West Coast with her new friends. After Sara passed, I learned that she had been working with the Comedy Gives Back team, Zoe, and Jodi Lieberman and Amber Lawson, producing and moderating their weekly comedy connect zoom events. Of course she was, I said, laughing when Zoe filled me in..  She could do anything!

Sara started a podcast with her long time friend Esther Ku, who she adored, and talked about constantly. She was planning another podcast with other comedy fans.  And she was even working on a pilot script about her experiences in life and in comedy.

She inspired others to start writing comedy, like Marty Younge, a Toronto comedy fan who met Sara at Just for Laughs and became inspired to want to write as well. Marty wrote about Sara on her Instagram.

“I met Sara’s words before I ever met her. Her column Notes from a Comedy Junkie was the ticket to glimpse into shows I couldn’t go to. That column was a living history of rooms and festivals moments where the biggest comedians relaxed and spoke candidly about fear and fame. That’s the thing about comedy it’s so fleeting those moments that take so much to make crackle and fade. Sara saw their magic and made them last. She was capable of that sort of writing because that’s who she was as a person someone who really respected the art of Comedy for all it’s complex nuance. She basked in the process of solidifying imperfection and examining it under-stage lights. It turning out all better then it began. She loved a show. She loved all parts of what that took she saw them appreciated them. To have a Sara Dahms article written about you it was truthful and celebratory. She did not frame or angle her stories in accordance to anyone but herself. I love how she would cover the roasts and totally changed how I came to think of them as a major comedy event. A break out moment for stand ups and writers. When I did finally meet this beautiful person it is not a understatement she changed my life. Getting me my first writing gigs at The Interrobang. At Just for Laughs in 2018 When I saw her again in 2019 she was so proud of all that I had accomplished. I remember gushing over the gala tickets we had both gotten. She promised me to show me around Skankfest when I went. She was so gracious in the industry. Would talk comedy with anyone long enough to know if they knew their stuff or not. Introduced everyone around her without pretentiousness. Doing the red carpet at Just for Laughs was one of her true joys. Just for laughs is huge but I know the streets of Montreal will feel so empty without you this summer. I also know a part of you will always be there.”

The last time I heard from Sara, she had reached out because she heard and was moved by the birthday tribute and memorial announcement for Fez Whatley, long time co-host of the Ron and Fez Show who had passed away in August. She said she planned to fly in for the event, and asked if she could write a post about it.  I told her “love it, thank you” and now only days later, we are memorializing her. It’s unthinkable.

All of Sara’s comedy experiences were in addition to her own “regular” life, where she was an incredible mother to two beautiful children, Ben and Amelia. She was a wife, a sister, and a beautiful daughter.  She was as a teacher a middle school counselor and received national recognition for her work.

Sara was magic. Sara was a star.  And she was utterly irreplaceable.  Her contributions to comedy were important and meaningful, and we will not forget her.  Her effect on the people she met and called friends was immeasurable.  You can see in the photos she took sometimes with comedians (check out the updated video below), that these were not typical “stand-next-to-a-stranger” for a pic shots. There was real reciprocated warmth in every one of the images.

You can read all 80 of her written contributions to The Interrobang here. I hope you will read them, to learn about comedy, to see her recommendations, or just to feel her energy.

We will miss her every day, and she will never be forgotten.

Sara has not only left a void in our lives, but in the lives of her children. Her brother has set up a Gofundme account to benefit her two kids and to help pay for funeral costs.   If you can help, here is the link.

https://www.gofundme.com/f/donate-in-memory-of-sara-lemesdahms

Just some of the people she wrote about, this is a partial list. Chris Rock, Anthony Jeselnik, Ardie Fuqua, The Goddamn Comedy Jam with Josh Adam Meyers, Dan Soder, Nate Bargatze, Yamaneika Saunders, Sal Vulcano, Rory Scovel, Liza Treyger and Michelle Buteau, Jeremiah Watkins, Roast Battle, Jeffrey Ross, Sarah Silverman, Judd Apatow, Mike Lawrence, Bill Burr, Seinfeld, Nikki Glaser, Don Barris, Tammy Pescatelli, Derek Gaines, Mike Vecchione, Earl Skakel, Christine Evans, Rebecca Trent, Dave Smith, Robert Kelly, Rich Vos, Luis J. Gomez, Joe DeRosa, Michael Che, Colin Jost, Dave Attell, Colin Quinn, Godfrey, Jimmy Carr, Jim Carrey and the cast of I’m Dying Up Here, Jessica Kirson, David Baddiel, Jeremiah Watkins, Paul Provenza, Barbara Roman, Cathy Carlson, Donnell Rawlings, Chappelle, Chappelle, Chappelle, Pete Davidson, Wil Sylvince, Barry Katz, Joe List, Sarah Tollemache, Dave Attell, Mike Finoia, Mark Normand, Bert Kreischer, Anthony Cumia, Dan Soder, Aaron Berg, Mark Normand, Chris Gethard, Matteo lane, Bonnie McFarlane, Pete Lee, Doug Stanhope, Lynn Koplitz, Shannon Noll, Larry Bloom, Seth Davis, Gilbert Gottfried, Weird Al, Kurt Metzger, Janelle James, Dice, Doug Benson, Scott Thompson, Deanne Smith, Hannibal Buress, Eric Andre, Vic Mensa, Wayne Federman, Ian Edwards, Adrienne Iapalucci, George from the Comedy Cellar, Joe List, Jason Kantor, Dina Hashem, Gary Gulman, Louis C.K., Jeff Garlin, Zac Amico, Bronston Jones, Martin Moreno, Dane Cook, Julie Seabaugh, Brian Moses, Krystyna Hutchinson, Frank Castillo, Jamar Neighbors, Zoe Friedman, Andrew Schulz, Emma Willmann, Beth Stelling, Andrew Santino, Byron Bowers, Cindy Chupak, John Dore, Jim Jefferies, Erin Foley, Andy Kindler, Jessica Kirson, Margaret Trudeau, Sarah Cooper, Kerryn Feehan, Brendan Sagalow, Cipha Sounds, Mike Cannon, Mike Feeney, Dulce Sloan, Michael Kosta, Josh Johnson, Marina Franklin, Tiny Hinchcliffe, Paris Sashay, Rosebud Baker, Tom Segura, Franqi French, Brent Terhune, Jenny Yang, Bob Saget, Bobby Lee, and this is by no means a complete List.

She interviewed Tony Hinchliffe, Pete Holmes, Henry Winkler, Sam Levine, Esther Povitsky, Chris DiStefano, Joe DeRosa, Fahim Anwar, Brian Husky, Dom Irrera, Nikki Glaser, Dave Chappelle, Lil Rel, Howie Mandel, Marc Maron, Carly Mensch and Liz Flahive, Jo Koy, Tiffany Haddish, Dr. Katz, Maria Bamford, Jack Johnson, Kumail Nanjiani, Tony Hale, Jerry Seinfeld, Julia Louis Dreyfus, Ronny Chieng, Jason Manzoukas, Alonzo Bodden, Jim Jefferies, Chris Redd, Nick Kroll, Amanda Seales, Kevin Hart, Dita von Teese, Derek waters, Anne Dudes, the cast of South Side, Pete Lee, Nikki Glaser, Chris Redd, Mike Cannon, Mike Feeney, Sam Morril, Ms. Pat, Bobby Slayton, Tom Segura, Jessica Kirson, Annie Lederman, Cipha Sounds, Adrienne Iapalucci, Sam Morril, Patton Oswalt, Nate Bargatze, Rosebud Baker and Mo Amer.

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