Thursday May 25 Daily Links
THURSDAY 5.25
NEWS STORIES
DeSantis Presidential Announce Was a Total Stinkfest
Ron Desantis had a big exciting plan to announce his run for president. It was going to be historic- announcing the run on Twitter live with his good friend and tech genius Elon Musk. Except this tech forward move was audio only, and nothing worked properly. Now the whole internet is laughing at him.
But hey Ron don’t worry, Elon looks like a bigger loser than you.
DeSantis Friends Have a $200 Million Plan
A pro-DeSantis group is planning to raise a massive campaign fund for their buddy, expecting to raise over $200 million to take on DT.
Some of that money should have been spent on twitter servers.
FTX and Tesla Drop in Reputation
The Axios Harris poll measures brand reputations for 100 companies, and this years list shows a ginormous drop for FTX crypto exchange and Tesla.
Tesla is the crypto of automobiles.
FOX News Repossesses Tucker Carlsons Home Studio
Now that Tuck. no longer is welcome at FOX News studios, the company also wants his home equipment that they paid for. So they came and packed it all up, including the set he used to record from home.
They took the BAR! The whole FUCKING BAR!!!!!
Now There's an Armed Uber App
If you need a ride, but you want your driver strapped, call Black Wolf the only rideshare app where the drivers carry guns.
Finally crack dealers have their own rideshare.
Canada High School Offers the Safe Way to Snort Coke
A B.C. high school offered students safer snorting kits, including straws a cutting card and more.
This will save a lot of turtles.
When I was in high school, we heard from powerful guest speakers on why doing hard drugs had very serious (and potentially deadly) consequences.
Today in British Columbia, (and, in this specific case, a high school in the Cowichan Valley) they are handing out "safer snorting"… pic.twitter.com/T9WX4KZQI9
— Aaron Gunn (@AaronGunn) May 21, 2023
SPORTS
Cops Do Ja Morant Welfare Check
Ja Morant posted a goodbye message to family members on social media and everyone got so nervous, the cops were called to do a wellness check. He says he’s fine, and was only quitting social media.
Okay attention whore.
Andy Reid Doesnt Like New NFL Rule
A new NFL rule that changes kickoffs in order to minimize unnecessary injuries has pissed off Coach Andy Reid who thinks the NFL is going soft.. “We start taking pieces and we’ll see how this goes. But you don’t want to take too many pieces away or you’ll be playing flag football.”
And then he drank out of two hoses.
CELEBS & ENTERTAINMENT
Tina Turner Has Died
The queen of rock, who also played the acid queen in The Who’s Tommy has died at the age of 83 after a long illness.
At least she’s with Ike now.
Rita Wilson Explains Tom Hanks Viral Red Carpet Scowl
According to his wife, Tom Hanks wasn’t yelling at a red carpet staffer in Cannes. He was just confused about where to go, and couldn’t hear anyone, so he was shouting for directions.
Aww, Grandpa is lost and can’t hear.
America's Daddy, Pedro Pascal Is Not a Daddy
Pedro Pascal trended today, for an adorable daddy chat with Kieren McCulkin, and for saying no, he’s nobody’s daddy, and for finally admitting he only supplies the voice of the Mandelorian. Someone else does all the filmed movement.
if you’re not the daddy how come you’re trending on three topics today.
Brady Bunch House is On the Market
The Property Brothers are finished renovating the Brady Bunch house and now they’re listing it for sale for the low price of $5.5 million. They bought the house for 3 million but then renovated the interior to make it look exactly like the house the Brady’s live in.
In the meantime we can’t move Sharon Tate’s house at any price.
Asteroid City Divides Cannes Film Fest
Is it Wes Anderson’s best movie or his worst? The reviews are all over the place.
His worst movie is better than the best Marvel movie.
The Idol Tanks on Rotten Tomatoes
Sam Levinson’s movie about a pop idol called The Idol has a shit rotten tomatoes score. It got a 5 minute ovation at Cannes, but its RT score is less than 10%.
What do we need The Idol for when we have Britneys insta…
QT Directed Margot Robbies Feet
While doing press for Barbie, Margot Robbie also talked about being on set for Quentin Tarantino’s Once Upon a Time in America. The film contained 36 shots of her feet, and she said he directed her not to wash her feet before filming scenes.
If that’s not sexual harassment I dunno what is.
Ed Sheeran Visits High School Band
The singer-songwriter gave an intimate performance on Friday for Middleton and Blake High School students.
How many nerds can fit into one classroom?
STUDIES, SURVEYS, RANKINGS
nothing here yet
everything
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