Thursday December 3: Daily Links

Published by Interrobang Staff at December 3, 2020

THURSDAY 12.3

NEWS STORIES

Wacked Out Testimony In Voter Fraud Case Goes Viral, Trends Everywhere

The testimony of Melissa Carone, the ‘star witness’ in the President’s claims of voter fraud in Michigan, has gone viral. Victoria Jackson finally has a shot to return to SNL.

No You Won't Dig Up Warren G. Harding!

This dude whose grandma had an affair with the 29th President would like to scientifically prove he is former President WGH’s grandkid. How you ask? By digging up his granddaddy to get some DNA.

We know you are not the grandson of Warren G. Harding because digging up a long dead grandfather is not something a grandson would do.

But you do look like him.

In Case New Yorkers Were Wondering if it was Necessary to Shut Down The Verrazzano Bridge During Monday’s Storm

This video shows some pretty scary swaying in high winds that led to the closure. Yes, that bridge is breathing.

After that you’re going to need a drink at Mac’s Public House to calm your nerves.

The U.S. Needs A Secretary of Arts and Culture Now More than Ever

Like Churchill said, “then what would we be fighting for?”

Obama, Bush And Clinton Volunteer To Get Covid Vaccine To Prove Its Safety

Former US Presidents Obama, Bush and Clinton are volunteering to get their Covid vaccines on camera to prove the safety of it. Since Regis has passed away we’ll have to get Meredith Viera to host this version of Who Wants To Be Vaccinated?

Another Monolith Has Popped Up

Another monolith has appeared, this time on top of Pine Mountain in Atascadero, California. This better be aliens and not some viral campaign for a celebrity owned liquor company that sells schnapps in a monolith shaped bottle.

San Francisco Bans Vaping And Smoking Inside All Apartments

Smoking and vaping inside San Francisco apartments is now illegal. The law was passed to protect adjoining apartments from the effects of secondhand smoke. It will be ok to smoke weed, and that’s thanks to pressure from marijuana supporters. It’s also ok to defecate in the street apparently so that entire town is ass backwards.

Bill Barr Is On Thin Ice

Trump is “livid” with Bill Barr and his advisors are begging him not to fire the AG. This comes after Barr has been vocal about the President’s election fraud claims being smoke and mirrors. The good news is if he does get fired he can get a pay day writing yet another book about his old boss.

Plan To Keep Crowds Away From The Rockefeller Center Already Not Working

The plan to block people from viewing the tree at Rockefeller Center isn’t working. Crowds are now gathering in a small area where you can see the tree. Plan B is to the replace it with Charlie Brown’s Christmas tree.

SPORTS

Uh Oh Michigan -Ohio State Not Happening!?

It’s the biggest college football rivalry of all time and Ohio State and Michigan have played every single year since 1918. In 2020, Michigan is getting some ugly covid test returns so the game is on shaky ground.

Yea, we should cancel, said every Michigan fan.

Cris Collinsworth Shocked that Steelers have Female Fans

“Everybody’s a fan,” Collinsworth said. “In particular the ladies that I met. They have really specific questions about the game. I’m like wow, just blown away. …”

Welcome to this millennium, Cris. Sorry to make your head spin on that pencil neck.

Rafer Johnson Dead At 86

Olympic Gold Medalist Rafer Johnson passed away yesterday at the age of 86. He also co-founded The Special Olympics, served in the Peace Corps, and took the gun away from Sirhan Sirhan after Robert Kennedy’s assassination. Sorry Kid Rock, this is what an American badass looks like.

ENTERTAINMENT

Did Chappelle Invent Carpool Karoke!?

That fat English talk show guy thinks that Carpool Karaoke made his career. We will call you Viacom because you steal from Chapelle.

You want Rick James too?

Lady Gaga Pink and Green Oreos Are All We Need to Turn this Year Around!!

Wait… they’re not coming out till January?

Fuck.

George Clooney Already Teaching His Twins Gross Pranks

George Clooney’s twins are only three years old, but he’s already taught them how to pull off pranks in front of strangers. Their favorite one to is putting Nutella in their diapers, claim their diaper is dirty, then have the twins eat it out of the diaper. It’s going to part of their audition reel for Jackass: The Next Generation.

Title

The Goo Goo Dolls new holiday song and video homage to the Grinch Who Stole Christmas could become a Christmas Classic.

GOING VIRAL

Satan and 2020 Hook Up!

Sure this would be so funny except no one wants to see 2020 in a happy relationship. We want to see her dragged behind a jeep.

Too soon dude!

Understand the Difference Between a Millionaire and a Billionaire

It takes a Tik Toker to finally explain economics.

Billionaires should not exist pic.twitter.com/KRPbRNm5xp

— Tyler Evans (@tylerevansokay) December 2, 2020

STUDIES, SURVEYS, RANKINGS

Rotten Tomatoes 59 Best Christmas Movies of All Time

Buzzfeed would like to know how many of these 59 classic and modern classic Christmas movies you’ve seen. If you like to check off boxes you’re in for a treat.