It’s not even 2022 yet but let’s talk about the 2024 Presidential race. Biden is really old and everyone seemingly hates Kamala so the Dems COULD get Hillary back as their candidate in 2024 and we don’t know yet if Trump is all in committed to running then. So, this is fan fiction for now, but let’s hope this dystopian future doesn’t come to fruition.

Read more at The Hill.

1500 pages of documents were declassified this week, and one of the reveals was that Oswald met with the KGB before JFK was assassinated.

Do any of those pages say why he didn’t show up to meet QAnon?

Read more at NY Post.

Governor DeSantis is proposing a new law in Florida. The Stop Wrongs Against Our Kids and Employees Act would ban anyone from teaching critical race theory in k-12, and prevent districts from hiring its proponents. It would also “protect employees against a hostile work environment due to critical race theory training,” DeSantis claims that CRT –which merely teaches that racism is institutional in America in subtle ways– promotes hatred.

Protecting people from being fired for racist behavior, and demonizing teachers who want to teach inclusiveness? Remember when the GOP wanted the government to stay out of people’s business decisions?

Read more at usatoday.

The largest police force in the nation will now be run a woman for the first time in history.

Okay guys keep an eye on the meters.

Read more at CNN.

After riding in Bezos’ joy ride rocket, a 60 year old Florida businessman says he is a different person now.

We get it. You were replaced by an alien. Does Bezos charge extra for that?

Read more at Miami Herald.

Urban Meyer has been shitcanned from the Jaguars after only 13 games in his first season as an NFL coach. Expect to find him at his bar in Ohio doing body shots off of undergrads for the remainder of the college semester.

Read Shad Khan’s statement here.

Read more at Jaguars

The NFL player went on the Call her Daddy podcast and admitted that he was afraid to be in the locker room with his teammates because he was terrified he would be turned on, and inadvertantly out himself as gay to his teammates. “I never really was attracted to anybody who I played with, or coaches,” he said, “so, it’s sort of silly to even say that. But, I wanted to avoid any chance of being outed, so I would not shower with the rest of the team.”

Way to add ot the paranoia.

Read more at TMZ

Kevin James is playing New Orleans coach Sean Payton in the upcoming Home Team movie, so Barstool decided to cast every NFL coach in their own imaginary movies. Here are some of the highlights

Mel Gibson as Bill Belichick
Greg Kinnear as Ravens John Harbaugh
Omar Epps as Steelers’ Mike Tomlin
Liev Schrieber as Jags coach Urban Meyer
Frank Caliendo as Raiders’ John Gruden
Christian Bale as Chiefs’ Andy Reid
Jack Black as the coach of the Cowboys, Mike McCarthy
Justin Bartha as Eagles head coach Nick Sirianni
James Franco as Green Bay’s Matt LaFleur
John C. Reilly as Tampa Bay’s Bruce Arians
Richard Gere as Pete Caroll, head coach of the Seahawks
Bill Burr as Buffalo Bills Coach Sean McDermott

Bill can’t be a coach. Everyone knows he’s a punter for the Texans.

Read more at barstool.

Sideline reporter Michelle Tafoya will no longer be on the sidelines for Sunday Night Football. She’s leaving after the Super Bowl.

Who?

Read more at Mediaite

…$500 million!? That’s right, Bruce Springsteen just dumped the rights to all his music to Sony for fat cash. The constant touring for 40 years must not have paid all that well. Now he can buy the town of Asbury Park in its entirety like he’s always wanted.

Read more at the New York Times.

Ben Affleck went on Howard Stern to dish over his divorce from Jennifer Garner and he’s getting wrecked on social media. And the rumor is J-Lo is pissed that she’s getting dragged into it as well for being his current girlfriend. Ben, stay away from casino’s and liquor stores and the internet for your own good.

Read more at pagesix.

Do better. #BenAffleck #JenniferGarner #HowardStern #Divorce #Addiction pic.twitter.com/Bo4olki75m

— custodypeace (@custodypeace) December 15, 2021

Jeff Garlin is leaving the Goldberg’s effective immediately after an HR investigation. He apparently made cast and crew uncomfortable with some of his off camera jokes including ” Overall, Garlin’s go-to jokes that a number of people on the show found offensive were talking about grandma’s vagina, balls and brassier, a co-worker said.” Seems like this is the crews issue with their own grandmothers rather than anything Jeff said.

Read more at Deadline.

Keanu Reeves says when he first got to Hollywood, executives hated his name and wanted him to change it. One of the names he considered was Chuck Spedyna.

What he should have been called is Big Bag of Money.

Everyone is obsessing over “Selling Tampa.” a reality tv series about the hot real estate market in Tampa. The Netflix series follows an all black female agency full of very opinionated ladies, bringing the drama to mingle with the big money mansion porn.

Of course it’s a hit. It’s the View with much better scenery.

Read more at . buzzfeednews.

Pornhub’s Annual Year in Review is out with plenty of fascinating statistics about America’ porn habits. We learned that Americans consume far more porn than any other country, Hentai has surpassed Lesbian to become the #1 search term. The words romance, passionate and bromance experienced the most growth in search frequency. Footjob enjoys more traffic from New York State than any other in the nation. NJ is the king of femdom searches. And Florida is the state most often looking for Big Black Cock. And when it comes to favorite porn stars, Lana Rhoades took the coveted #1 spot.

You may remember her dad, Dusty Rhoades.

Read more at Bartool.

everything

A study suggests that the J&J vax produced virtually no antibody protection against Omnicron.

Lazy one shot bastards!

Read more at Bloomberg.