Monday October 19: Daily Links (Plus Weekend Links)

MONDAY 10.19


NEWS STORIES

 



Neil DeGrasse Tyson Says Asteroid Will Buzz Cut Earth Before Election Day

Neil DeGrasse Tyson said that a refrigerator-sized asteroid will ‘buzz cut’ Earth a day before the election, but it’s not big enough to cause harm. NASA confirmed that’s happening but said that there’s only a 1% chance it will hit somewhere in the country.

Is it too late to buy asteroid life insurance?

Read more at tmz.


Snopes Has to Debunk Theory That Biden Lives In The Dupont Mansion

Snopes had to step in when a theory that Joe Biden owns the Dupont Mansion started getting passed around on social media. There’s also a theory going around Donald Trump’s a billionaire, someone needs to debunk that too.

https://twitter.com/i/events/1317657999922491395


What's The Future Of Office Space In NYC?

New York Magazine took a deep dive speaking to many New Yorkers in the commercial real estate game to try and get a sense of where it’s all heading in a post-Covid world. Spoiler alert – things aren’t looking too great.

Read more at curbed.com.



SPORTS



Fight Breaks Out During Eagles Game

Covid will not stop Eagles fans from supporting their team.

Surfboard Sales Exploding During Pandemic

Surfing has become so popular during the pandemic that surfboard companies can’t keep up with the demand. The reasoning behind the spike is that surfing is great exercise, socially distant, and its cheap. Law enforcement officials are trying to see if there’s a connection between this and a spike in viewings of the movie Point Break.

Read more at tmz.


Dodger OF Dislocated Shoulder Celebrating Home Run

Dodger outfielder Cody Bellinger dislocated his shoulder celebrating his tie-breaking home run during last night’s Game 7 NLCS Series. Trainers were able to pop it back into place and Bellinger said he’s good to go for The World Series. They learned how to reset it quickly by YouTubing Lethal Weapon 2.

READ MORE AT TMZ.COM.



ENTERTAINMENT



Everyone Has a Natashia Lyonee Impression

She’s funny she’s crazy cool sexy. She has a voice that sounds like Jack Daniels and gravel.

She’s perfect

You can do the impression but you will never be her.


Are Cameron Diaz and Nicole Richie Sisters-In-Law !?

The short answer is no despite what the article claims. Are they married to twin brothers? Yes and that’s sick but it doesn’t make them Sisters-In-Law.

Fake News.

Read more at yahoo.


British Reality Star Releases Photos Of 2018 Machete Attack

British reality TV star David Pugh released photos showing the extent of his injuries after being attacked by five machete-wielding thieves during a 2018 home invasion. Pugh was covered in blood from his forehead to his waist, but said his martial arts background helped him repel the full brunt of the assault. Sign this dude up to be the next James Bond.

Read more at nypost.com.


Beastie Boys Gives Sabotage to Biden for Campaign Ad

Pretty cool but you know can have whatever Smash Mouth song he wants… except All Star. Or.. Walking on the Sun.

Read more at mashable.


Twitter has been Debating Which Chris Has to Go

Which Chris can we chuck off the lifeboat? Evans, Pine, Hemsworth, and Pratt

Was this was too easy? Maybe let’s make it interesting, switch Chris Pratt with Chris Elliot.


Disney+ adds Further Content Warnings

Old movies with outdated and racist content will get more warnings if they are going to appear on Disney Plus.

Hey while you’re at it, how about a warning to say you’re going to cry your eyes out when we kill of the mom.

Read more at gizmodo.


George Clooney Said Hollywood Shunned Him After Batman & Robin Bombed

George Clooney said that Hollywood directors refused to work with him after Batman & Robin laid an egg at the box office. The former ER star added that things didn’t turn around until he did Out Of Sight with Steven Soderbergh. What gave it away that the movie was going to suck – the script or the nippled Batsuit?

Read more at dailymail.co.uk.


Bruce Willis Reprises Die Hard Character To Sell Car Batteries

After running #DieHardisBack teaser ads on Twitter, fans of the popular action franchise didn’t get an trailer for a 6th film, but an ad featuring Bruce Willis promoting Die Hard car batteries. The two minute clip also featured John McClane and Argyle the limo driver dodging bad guys and bullets in order to get a new car battery for his car. Willis also plans to reprise his role as Butch from Pulp Fiction to promote new Harley choppers.

Read more at yahoo.com.


The Rock Sends 101 Year Old Fan Tequila For Her Birthday

Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson made Marie Grover’s 101st Birthday a memorable one by sending her two bottles of his Teremana Tequila. The Rock did playfully warned Grover to sip it and not take any celebratory shots. The warning wasn’t necessary – everyone knows she takes swigs directly from the bottle.

Read more at people.com.



GOING VIRAL



Florida Man Makes a Leaf Blower-Powered Vehicle

What do you get when you cross Thomas Edison and Mary Poppins ? Whacked out Florida Man.

Any way to add meth and an alligator?

Via digg.



Subway Dog Will Steal Your Heart

Who’s a good dog ? Who loves the good dog?

Everyone loves the good dog !

If this was a movie this dog would turn into a woman.


Two Girls with the Heaviest Life Lesson by Way of.. Fruit Snacks?

You know how you’ve been cursing God for all the grape fruit snacks you’ve been getting? Oh you don’t do that? Oh you don’t even eat fruit snacks because you’re not 8 years old anymore? Okay, this might not be for you then.



STUDIES, SURVEYS, RANKINGS



Are Docuseries The New Reality TV?

Vultures asks if the new plethora of docuseries being produced are no different than the reality tv boom we saw years ago. This is all The Jinx’s fault.

Read more at vulture.com.

WEEKEND STORIES


NEWS STORIES

 



Ivanka and the Hatch Act

This may shock you but those Trump kids don’t have to follow the rules. Ivanka’s knick name is Hatch back.

Read more at citizensforethics.com.


What Wines Go With McDonalds Food?

Grubstreet decided to pair wines with specific McDonalds menu items. They could have saved some time and just said Boones Farm for all of them.

Read more at grubstreet.


The Sturgis Biker Rally Looks To Have Cause A Covid Outbreak In The Upper Midwest

Weeks after the Sturgis rally, the Dakotas, Wyoming, Minnesota and Montana all had surges in covid cases. Let’s all blame that area of the country’s love of Smash Mouth for this.

Read more at washingtonpost.com.


Pfizer Sez They Won't Be Applying To Authorize Their Vaccine Before Mid November

Pfizer announced that they won’t be aiming to release their Covid vaccine before mid November. And even then we’re all going to have worry about Bill Gates’ microchips living inside of us.

Read more at nytimes.


Coca Cola Kickin Tab Out

After 57 years, the Coca Cola bottling company will no longer produce the diet cola Tab.

No more TAB. What will suburban moms drink now! This is a disaster! Noooooo!!!

Worst news of 1967.

Read more at nydailynews.com.


Japan Plans To Release Contaminated Water Into The Sea

Nearly 10 years after the Fukushima meltdown, Japan plans to release over a million tons of contaminated water into the sea. The next time you order fish and its glowing with eight eyes, send it back.

Read more at nypost.


JFK Jr. To Replace Mike Pence According To QAnon

A new QAnon theory sez JFK Jr. is still alive and will be replacing Mike Pence as Trump’s running mate. This would make perfect sense to happen in 2020.



SPORTS



Eli Manning Trolls New Jersey

Eli Manning lived in a New Jersey a long time. He finally told the people he doesn’t buy that the Jewish ‘sloppy joe’ is the real sloppy joe.

He likes the shitty one


Lindsey Vonn's Butt Is Gold Medal

Lindsey Vonn has spent her life on the slopes so why wouldn’t she have a perfectly sloped butt?

USA! USA! USA! USA!

Read more at yahoo.com.


NFL Has No New Positive Covid Tests Across The League

This morning the NFL has reported no new positive coronavirus tests so the days games should go as planned. Get your bets in now folks who knows how long this will last!


Nick Saban Dances With Team After Win

It was a good day for Nick Saban. The Alabama coach’s COVID test was negative and then the Tide beat Georgia, so Saban decided to do a little dance with the team. Good day for Nick, bad day for anyone who had to watch him dance.

Read more at tmz.



ENTERTAINMENT



GQ Asks Whatever Happened To Brendan Frasier?

GQ goes deep into looking into the fall of Brendan Frasier’s career. Can’t you people just leave him alone?

Read more at gq.com.


Matthew McConaughey's Dad Came and Went

Matthew McConaughey claims that his father had a heart attack while making love to his mom.

Well not his dad’s mom.

Matthews Mom.

Read more at pagesix.com.


Home Improvement Kid Busted For Strangulation

Zachery Ty Bryan was arrested in Oregon after he had an argument with a woman he was in a relationship with. Allegedly, Bryan put his hands around her throat at some point and tried to strangle her.

Something was always a tad off on this kid. Took awhile but he finally did what we always expected.

Read more at tmz.


Phil Rosenthal's: Somebody Feed the People

Phil is ready to bring meals to people waiting in election lines this year and he’s created something called Somebody Feed The People.

Phil Rosenthal thinks about food more than anything else. He knows that people will be in long voting lines and wants them to nosh while they wait.

Phil up your plate with Phil.

Read more at hollydwoodreporter.com.


Leslie Jones Doesn't Miss SNL

Leslie Jones doesn’t miss her old gig. She wasn’t free there and couldn’t be creative.

‘Supermarket Sweep’ giver her a chance to stretch

Really.

Read more at thr.com.


Matt and Ben are Back!

2020 has been a water park of hot shit. Until now ! Matt and Ben are here and they are teasing each other like a twink and snack daddy.

How do you like them apples?

Read more at eonline.


JLaw and ARod Back a Candidate

Undecideds have been waiting for one thing before they get out to vote

Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriguez of course.

They are backing…

JoBide!!

Read more at pagesix.


Lawyers Claim No One Raised A Finger To Stop R Kelly Jail Beating

Lawyers for R. Kelly claim that no one at the Metropolitan Correctional Center ‘raised a finger’ to stop an inmate from assaulting the singer until he was well into the attack. Kelly, who is currently being held on sexual abuse charges, suffered ‘significant physical and psychological injuries’ and his attorneys are hoping to get him released on bond. Kelly plans to use the experience for his next video, ‘Trapped In A Beatdown’.

Read more at chicagotribune.com


Rapper Busted For Bragging In Music Video About Getting Rich Off Fake Unemployment Claims

Rapper Nuke Bizzle has been busted for scamming $1.2 million from the Pandemic Unemployment Assistance program after bragging about it in a music video. He needed to stick to rapping about all the coke he sells.The Feds don’t care about that.

Read more at cbslocal.




GOING VIRAL



Milk First Like a Weirdo

Don’t know who the Straight family is or why other people know who they are.

From this, only can tell that they stink.


Robot Dolphin Better Than The Real Thing

Yeah sure the idea of a robot is frightening except for a robot dolphin for the backyard pool.

Wish I had a Tab to celebrate.

Via digg.



Zamboni Catches Fire During Resurfacing

A zamboni caught on fire while it was resurfacing an ice skating rink in Rochester. No one was hurt, but parents were pissed that the socially distanced version of Sesame Street On Ice got cancelled.


Dog Sings Along To The Star Trek Theme

A dog loves the Star Trek theme so much, that it sings along to it every time it comes on. It’s also the dog’s way of saying it’s time for a walk.

Good boi sings to Startrek intro every time he hears the horns.. and has perfect pitch. He’s never done this for anything else.




STUDIES, SURVEYS, RANKINGS



Playing White Noise Actually Screws Up Your Sleep

A new study has found that playing white noise to help you sleep at night actually can lead to worse sleep and the initial research on the matter was dodgy at best. Instead, play a loop of a car alarm going off, that should give you the rest you need.

Read more at theguardian.



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