Browns Fan Puts His Team Loyalty Up For Sale On eBay

 

After 30 years of devout fandom, Cleveland born Browns fan, Jared Kalinowski is done with the Cleveland Browns.  He’s selling his Browns Fandom on eBay to the lowest bid and you can purchase it.  Yes you can bring football superfan Jared Kalinowski to your side, have him root for your team, go to your team’s games and wear your team’s colors.  Why would anyone want to sell their football fandom? Kalinowski told us that he’s sick of putting up with bad decisions:

“Ever since 1999 there has been new leadership every 1-3 years. Every change brings about a new group of cocksure megalomaniacs who know their system is the best system and their people are the best people. This leads to any talent being stripped from the team so the new group can bring in their own people who don’t have enough time to develop before the next leadership group is in changing the system again.”

And then this year’s draft sealed the deal for him.  “Management KNEW Josh Gordon had this potential suspension in a wide receiver deep draft and do they adjust to try and solve the problem…no they stick to the people they want to pick and say well we got another first round pick from the Bills and that we wouldn’t make a deep playoff run so we need to wait until next year.”

By week three, Kalinowski said,  it’s always the same thing “There’s always next year” and he’s sick of hearing it.  But what about Johnny Football?  Surely that must have made him feel better, right?  Nope.

“Prior to the draft. There was not one person who wanted Johnny football. But this is the beauty of Cleveland fans and their endless hope. As soon as Johnny was picked all the fan said well he is ours now, so we have to support him. Of course he brings an excitement to the team by the way he plays but Josh Gordon may be gone all year and our number 2 receiver has a broken arm that management knew about prior to the draft as well. Did they address it…no. The browns fans just have to take it.”

We asked Jared what was his worst experience as Browns fan.  Kalinowski said, “when that rat Art Modell took the team to Baltimore. Sure we got a team four years later… But since 1999 we have been the embarrassment of the league and the Ravens have won two Super Bowls and been an example of a profoundly well run team.”   Kalinowski is sick of hearing the excuse that “its a business” and being asked to pay taxes for the stadium.  “If the browns are a business then what type of product have they put out that is worth supporting?”

So who wants to buy Jared’s Fandom?  He’s ready to root for your team no matter what team you support– all you have to is win the ebay auction.  Well, almost any team.  “The only two teams not in play are the Ravens and Steelers,” he said.

“People say ‘you were born in the area and grew up on the Browns you can’t change teams’ and I say why? If I can take my fandom to a team that is well run, great. And if the winning bid picks a team that is poorly run then hey it can’t be much worse than Cleveland. Heck the winning bidder may even pick me to continue to root the Browns and if that’s the case then I’ll continue to do so. At least have a little money in my pocket to make up for the thousands and thousands I’ve spent.

Jared also went on The Ron and Fez Show today to talk about his fandom.

Does your team need every fan it can get?  To bid on this sad man’s NFL fandom, go to ebay.com

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