Hair Samples of four former Presidents will be shot into space on Celestis’ upcoming deep space Enterprise Mission atop the Vulcan Centaur rocket. Verified samples from George Washington, John F. Kennedy, Dwight D. Eisenhower, and Ronald Regan will make the trip to space.

Trump’s hair sample will not be making the trip but instead will spend time at Ripley’s Believe it Or Not museum in Times Square.

Read more at TMZ

Bernie Sanders is charging $95 to attend an event promoting his book titled “It’s Okay to Be Angry About Capitalism.”

He’s also selling anti-suicide nooses for $50 in the lobby.

Read more at mediaite.

Mark Zuckerberg likes what Elon is doing over at the new Twitter, and plans to make some changes himself. Facebook and Instagram will give you a checkmark, better protection against identity theft, and access to customer support. All you have to do is pay $12. No… make that $15 per month if you have an iphone.

In other news Zuckerberg is mulling over buying and ruining an electric car company just to keep up.

Read more at TMZ

An alligator was pulled out of a Prospect Park lake in Brooklyn near Duck Island.

The alligator was quoted as saying it was trying to get away from all the Northeasterners who winter in Florida.

Read more at NY Post.

Congratulations, Panthers, a new poll conducted by The Athletic says you made the best head coach hire, as voted by nine key NFL reps. Sean Peyton got zero votes for his move to the Broncos.

Enjoy this Reich, Saturday is still waiting in the wings.

Read more at Bleacher Report

Former Tennis champion Boris Beckers said “While I was inside (jail), Novak supported me, he supported my family. I started crying when he started winning. I’m very proud that probably the best player of all time is part of this story.” The sentimental moment was revealed in Boom! Boom! The World vs. Boris Becker, a documentary on Becker’s life directed by Alex Gibney. Becker was in jail for six months in the UK for tax evasion.

Okay so now we know. There’s crying in Tennis.

Read more at Deadline.

Kardashian posted some of her workout on Instagram Stories and got rrrrriiiippped. Not muscles, she got torn apart by viewers who said her form is shit, and that she could get hurt, and that her trainer should be ashamed.

“They look fine to me,” said every guy watching.

Read more at The Sun

The actor suffered a brain aneurysm and is currently in critical condition Sizemore is best known for films like “Heat,” “Natural Born Killers,” “Pearl Harbor” and “Black Hawk Down” and “Saving Private Ryan.” His condition is currently wait and see.

He’s a legend for Scagnetti alone.

Read more at CNN

The comedian and actor passed away at his home in France. His dear friend Bill Sheft told THR that his last words were ‘Fuck you, motherfucker.’”

What a mic drop.

Read more at THR

The awards circuit are all addicted to being roasted and Apatow did nothing to change this when he hosted the DGA Awards, roasting Tom Cruise, Gerard Butler and the irrelevance of the DGA awards. “This show is being live-streamed to the back of this room. This show is so irrelevant, it’s shocking Elon Musk hasn’t bought it yet.”

At this rate it won’t be long before Zingbot will be hosting the Oscars.

Read more at TMZ

The original voice of Barney- Bob West- loves the new look even though nobody else does. And wants to bring his OG voice to the new incarnation of the popular purple dinosaur.

Hey Bob, no one likes an ass kisser.

Read more at TMZ

Hollywood photographer Julian Wasser died this month at the age of 89, but in life, he had unprecedented access to Hollywood Royalty and his candids are a look into the past.

The past is so much better than the future.

Read more at The Ankler

A TikTok video showed a stunning hand painted foyer of a house that is being put up for sale along with the narration that its all going to be repainted in a neutral color in order to make the home more marketable. Twitter users claim that they can never feel joy again knowing this will be painted over.

Are you telling me there’s not one guido who would buy this house?

MY HEART JUST BROKE NOOOOOOO pic.twitter.com/BZiAGnIu2E

— kie (@criminalplaza) February 16, 2023

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