After Steve Bannon failed to show up in response to a subpoena from the January 6 commission, a Federal Grand Jury indicted him fro two counts of contempt of congress. A US Attorney will now decide whether to prosecute.

Don’t worry Steve, I’m sure the January 6 crowd is planning a jail break.

Read more at NY Times.

Everyone’s weirded out by the Final Destination feeling death of Glen deVries who traveled to space just last month on Bezos Blue Origin with William Shatner. He died in a plane crash in New Jersey.

Weirdly, Captain Kirk was the one talking about death.

Read more at tmz.com.

It’s said that every hour there’s at least one tweet about putting butter on a PopTart, so the company that sells the toaster pastries would like to cash in on that. They’re partnering with a smallbatch butter maker to create kits sold with three classic pop tart flavors and six fancy butter blends.

Finally a pop tart with flavor.

Read more at ABC.

Save the date: we’re releasing a limited-edition Pop-Tarts + specialty butter pairing with @BannerButter on Tuesday 11/16 at 12pm ET.

Because What Would Pop-Tarts Do? Upgrade the butter on Pop-Tarts game. pic.twitter.com/pbvXu6IiDi

— Pop-Tarts (@PopTartsUS) November 9, 2021

In the fight to legalize, veterans who say the drugs have quieted thoughts of suicide and eased the pain of their long term injuries are taking a central role.

The Vietnam Veterans never asked for permission.

Read more at DNYUZ.

Instagram’s TikTok clone REELS isn’t crushing it, so the company is paying influencers to post and get things moving for them.

Five figures? Is that full frontal?

Read more at The Verge

Donald Trump was asked about the behavior of the January 6 insurrectionists who were chanting that they wanted to hang Mike Pence. Trump said it was understandable because they were mad that he was willing to certify the election.

Okay finally we agree with Trump on something.

Read more at Axios.

This dude says he is not going to kill or eat this rare and beautiful cotton candy color lobster that he caught off coast of Maine.

Where you getting your cotton candy dude?

Read more at usatoday.

Gruden is suing everyone. He’s suing the NFL, he’s suing Roger Goodell, he says they forced him out of his job as head coach for the Las Vegas Raiders and he wants to be compensated.

Then why did you quit?

Read more at ESPN

Dwayne Johnson had to give an explanation after people were weirded out to learn that he pees in water bottles while he’s working out. He said its not weird, its just that his gym doesn’t have bathrooms.

Wait till you hear where he shits.

Fan girls and boys and supporters showed up in droves to celebrate the moment a judge freed Britney Spears from her oppressive conservatorship.

Anyone have a feeling this is going to end really badly?

Read more at deadline.

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Now that the outrage over Chris Pratt’s Instagram post about his “healthy child” are starting to subside, people are starting to notice the other unsavory sentences in that same post. Busy Phillips was kind of grossed out by what she called his patronizing attitude toward his wife.

“Holy s—. Either like you’re the dumbest mothef—er on Earth, or you’re a real righteous asshole.” Busy said. She pointed to his false humility: ‘She runs the show I occasionally open a bag of pickles” calling it patronizing, and was annoyed by his comparison between his wife and his Griffey Jr. Rookie card.

Chris we’re not blaming you, but it could be a good time to take a little social media break. They haven’t even started in on your opening sentence yet, and that’s a cringefest too.

Read more at TooFab.

Buzzfeed has discovered that every actor who played a lead male role in the movie Mean Girls has come out as gay. Damian aka Daniel Franzese came out in 2014. He says Kevin G and Aaron Samuels followed in his footsteps.

Also every guy who ever enjoyed the movie.

Read more at Buzzfeed

Chris Diamantopoulos stars in the new movie Red Notice, but he was also in the Office, Silicon Valley, Community, Arrested Development and you’ve seen him all over the place really. He wants everyone to know he wasn’t trying to breakup Jim and Pam.

No stupid, it’s Jim and Sam.

Read more at Salon.

A ten minute version of the song All Too Well implies that a nine year age difference between Tay Swift and Jake G was responsible for the breakup.

You dated ten years ago, for three months and now you’re releasing a ten minute song. Even Dave Chappelle moves on from topics faster than you do.

Read more at Page Six.

everything

So what do you do if you know that the Vaccine is just a way to track us, and poison us, but you also want to get into that cool restaurant, club or movie theater in cities with mandates? Well, good news, on TikTok, Dr Carrie Madej shared ingredients for a bath that will suck out the poison AND the nanobots allowing you to outsmart our overlords. Baking soda and epsom salts will remove the radiation, bentonite clay will suck out the poisons and borax will take care of those nasty robots in your bloodstream.

Other “experts” are teaching people to cut their skin open to remove the vaccine after the fact, or use syringes to uninject themselves.

You don’t trust the vaccine but you believe this lunatic?

Read more at Yahoo.

Pixar made this 4-minute vintage version of Monsters Inc in the style of some of the earliest animated cartoons and the internet is loving it.

The animation still looks more sophisticated than powerpuff girls.

A guy asked the question, did our favorite characters on the tv show Seinfeld influence us so much that we lost our empathy?

Yeah, that’s why we’re assholes. And you can trace every shitty comment in a causation diagram back to the source- Larry David.

did Seinfeld the show (not the human) completely eradicate empathy from cultural consciousness or did it just show people that they had an unhealthy amount of things in common with people who had no empathy? or neither? I just started from S1E1 and I already feel surly

— keith buckley (@deathoftheparty) November 7, 2021