Brad Parscale, former Trump campaign manager, barricaded himself in his Florida home on Sunday, and threatened to kill himself.

Authorities were called and Parscale has been hospitalized and under supervision. Good ol’ Baker Act in full swing.

Read more at local10.com.

Turns out Donald Trump hasn’t paid taxes in about 15 years and in 2016 and 2017 just paid $750 bucks. He’s apparently been writing off all his debt to avoid paying anything to the IRS. Nothing to worry about though, mostly poor people get to go to prison over tax fraud.

Read more at nytimes.com.

Brad Pascale, Trump’s former campaign manager has been hospitalized after locking himself in his home and threatening to harm himself. He’s also being investigated to taking funds from Trump’s 2020 campaign. Sounds like it’s time to bring Bannon back in.

Read more at dailymail.co.uk.

Salt Bae’s Boston restaurant has been closed almost as soon as it was opened due to complying with covid regulations. He needs to start using hand sanitizer if he’s gonna sprinkle salt all over everyone’s food.

Read more at newsweek.com.

While battling a fire at a Brooklyn brick row house, firefighters cut through a drywall ceiling and cash wrapped in plastic bags and tinfoil started landed on their heads. Close to million dollars was recovered and was claimed by the residents of the home. You’re supposed to torch the place, then claim the insurance money, not the other way around.

Read more at nypost.com.

Joe Montana and and his wife found a crazy woman in their beach house that had taken their grandchild from a crib and attempted to leave with the 9 month old. Don’t worry.

Joe Cool was always good in the clutch.

Read more at tmz.

Bill Murray will throw out the first pitch for all-women Athletes Unlimited final home game of the season. He was also offered his services to pinch hit, but had to be reminded it was a softball league for the ladies.

Read more at pagesix.com.

For the first time in history, an NFL game featured a female ref and female coach on each sideline.

Well it took a while but we’ve got 3 ladies on the field. Oh not including you, cheerleaders.

For the first time in NFL history, there will be a game featuring a female ref and female coach on each sideline 👏

▪️ Jennifer King – Washington Full-year coaching intern
▪️ Sarah Thomas – NFL Referee
▪️ Callie Brownson – Browns Chief of Staff

📸: @Browns pic.twitter.com/eQnuAYqLbp

— espnW (@espnW) September 27, 2020

Those cut outs don’t look 6 feet away.

Oh my god, you could give Coronavirus to Kenny!!! You bastard!!!

Read more at si.com.

Gang’s all here. 😅@SouthPark | @ComedyCentral pic.twitter.com/3OLVXQSK12

— Denver Broncos (@Broncos) September 27, 2020

A new Amazon Original called Utopia is being called ill-timed. It’s filled with conspiracy theories including one where dark forces convince the public there’s a deadly new virus so they can poison people and blame it on the virus, and fake a vaccine that will sterilize the population

Jesus Christ Amazon. The streets are already about to explode over rumors and conspiracy theories.

We don’t need a match for this gasoline.

Read more at slate.

For a chill show about baked goods where it’s not about money, with calming music and cut always to bunnies in a field… why does it make you want to flip a table that season 10 is ranked so goddamn slow?!

Read more at variety.com.

Singer-songwriter Sufjan Stevens said performing ‘Mystery Of Love’ at the 2018 Oscars was traumatizing and compared the experience to a ‘horrifying Scientology end of the year prom’. At least the Scientology prom has a shorter run time.

Read more at indiewire.com.

Former Prince bassist Mark Brown claims in a new book that working with the Purple One was never easy. Brown claims Prince relentlessly fined him for stage miscues, denied him a writing credit on the hit, ‘Kiss’, and would get late night calls to work on new material. James Brown thought Prince was being too light on them.

Read more at nypost.

Joaquin Phoenix and his girlfriend Rooney Mara had their first child together, River, named after his late brother. It’s official: they are officially the coolest family in show business.

Read more at nme.com.

Gwyneth Paltrow celebrated her 48th birthday by posting an nude pic on Instagram. While she received compliments from her celebrity friends, her daughter Apple wasn’t happy about it, posting a displeased ‘MOM’ in the comments section. Apple’s upset that when boys kiss her, they’ll be pretending its her mom.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Gwyneth Paltrow (@gwynethpaltrow)

You don’t expect much when you are a loyal dog. Warm place to sleep. A walk to shit a couple of times a day.

And plenty of food, bitch.

Putting Doggo on a diet. pic.twitter.com/6l2OEE5K48

— ♛ Braden Port ♛ (@Gamer__Guy) September 26, 2020

A photographer believes he captured Elvis’s face in a picture of a huge wave taken in the UK. We’ve finally gotten proof Elvis IS alive and he’s a Sea Spirit just like Aquaman.

Read more at whatsnew2day.com.

Headline: All shook up! Face of Elvis appears in giant wave as 65mph winds hammer east coast.

Is Elvis one of the 4 horsemen? I'm not up on my apocalyptic trivia…https://t.co/4IVk7eGhxN pic.twitter.com/Dyxn0etXVx

— Grumpy Dingo Radio (@RadioDingo) September 27, 2020

Elvis’s face appears in a giant wave as 65 mph winds sweep along the east coast https://t.co/feaADT60Si

— 9 Breaking News (@9_breaking_news) September 26, 2020

A new state audit found that from 2015 to 2019, two thirds of New York City streets and sidewalks were filthy. In other news, the sky is blue and there’s widespread corruption in politics.

Read more at nypost.

The big difference between male sex workers and female sex workers is really only one thing,

Dudes can be fat.

Read more at buzzfeednews.com.

Fred Perry the British counterculture polo design brand says that they don’t support the proud boys who wear the brand.

It’s not the first time Fred Perry has had to explain they don’t support white supremacy, skinheads, or nazis. Who knows why those sorts have always loved the brand, but can you blame them?

Tommy Bahama, anything you’d like to share as well???

Read more at fredperry.com.

2020, choose the form of your destructor!

Read more at cnn.com.

A giant robot resembling the 1970s anime figure Gundam has been tested in Yokohama, Japan. The robot stands at nearly 60 feet tall and weighs 24 tons. https://t.co/TXvXUPjucl pic.twitter.com/wd3Uv0mhaj

— CNN International (@cnni) September 26, 2020

astronaut Kate Rubins is voting from the international space station (and You Haven’t Even Decided Your Voting Plan).

This mail-in ballot thing has gone too far!!! (Literally)

Read more at gizmodo.

A Canadian Mayor is describing the current state of America and its Covid response as “watching the decline of the Roman Empire”. Yeah, ok, but did the Roman’s force the Visigoths to give them control of a social media app like America just did? Didn’t think so.

Read more at newsweek.com.

In a recent interview, the CEO of Phillip Morris International said that he sees cigarette sales ending completely in many countries within the next 10 to 15 years. Now you’ll be able to tell your kids how cool you used to look and that they’ll never be able to achieve that with a Juul.

Read more at moneycontrol.com

Kids are feeling trapped at the University of Colorado, Boulder after all gatherings indoors and out were banned.

Oh man. College is such a blast in 2020. No parties, no shows. Great time to study!

Can’t wait for Spring break when we get to see the folks!

Read more at cbslocal.com.

When my baby. When my baby smiles at me I go to Rio
De Janeiro, my-oh-me-oh
I go wild and then I have to do the Samba
And La Bamba.”

Not this time.

Read more at apnewscom.

Hey fatty great news. Next time you are sitting in the car choking down a Bic Mac, large fries
and Chocolate shake, you get to top it off with a deep fried apple pie.

#MAGA

Read more at yahoo.com.

Ron Paul had some kind of stroke-like attack during a live-stream of his “Liberty Report” on YouTube.

Later, Ron Paul Shared on his Twitter that he was doing fine and thanked everyone for their concern.

Tweeting after you’re okay after your livestream stroke? You’re not a normal grandpa are you, Dr Paul?

Read more at nypost.

Message from Ron Paul: "I am doing fine. Thank you for your concern." pic.twitter.com/aALmLn8xIj

— Ron Paul (@RonPaul) September 25, 2020

Residents of a Villamalea, Spain got a real life version of ‘The Shining’ when a giant winery container got damaged, spilling 13,000 gallons of wine out into the street. Red Wine! Red Wine!

Read more at tmz.

You know what. Don’t click on this link. You don’t want to end up ‘Niagara Falls, Frankie Angel.’

You clicked it anyway. Damn.

Vanessa Bryant just posted this on IG & omg my heart 😩🥺🥺🥺❤️❤️❤️ pic.twitter.com/cOhjKoDoZ4

— Melissa (@_Prettyyassh) September 25, 2020

Apparently the Raiders are under investigation for violating NFL Covid-19 rules after their game on MNF. To be fair, they just beat the Saints on Monday night as 4 point underdogs, give them a break.

Las Vegas Raiders are now under investigation from the NFL for violating COVID-19 protocols and allowing unauthorized locker room access Monday night, league sources tell ESPN:https://t.co/yiHMRXfuGw

— Adam Schefter (@AdamSchefter) September 27, 2020

Conor McGregor tweeted that he’s going to fight Manny Pacquiao in the Middle East. Pacquiao’s aide Jayke Joson confirmed that talks are ongoing, but plans to have the fight happen in December or early January. Joson said that Pacquiao plans to donate some of his earnings for COVID-relief efforts in the Philippians. McGregor’s purse will go towards keeping him out of jail.

Read more at espn.

David Beckham has become so obsessed with beekeeping during the lockdown, that he plans to start his own line of honey. Already rejected brand name: Sting ‘Em Like Beckham.

Read more at pagesix.com.

Admit it. There was a small part of you that thought if you met Emma Stone she’d see you for who you are and the two of you would fall madly in love. Well, it’s not you.

It’s some other fuck stick.

Read more at people.com.

35 years after the premiere of the hit tv show Growing Pains debuted, everyone in the cast reunited. Everyone except the creator and star who passed away in 2016.

Show me that smile again. (Show me that smile)
Don’t waste another minute on your cryin’.
We’re nowhere near the end (nowhere near)
The best is ready to begin.

Read more at people.com.

M Night’s new film is just called “Old”.

Old? Is it just about how we all feel 6+ in to quarantine?

Read more at variety.

Feels like a miracle that I am standing here shooting the first shot of my new film. It's called Old. #OldMovie @OldTheMovie pic.twitter.com/hth8jUum8K

— M. Night Shyamalan (@MNightShyamalan) September 26, 2020

According to a WGA filing the title of the Borat sequel is “Borat: Gift of Pornographic Monkey to Vice Premiere Mikhael Pence to Make Benefit Recently Diminished Nation of Kazakhstan”. Sasha Baron Cohen tried to file a sequel to Bruno but then realized no one wanted it.

Read more at thefilmstage.

The Rock has picked a side and has endorsed Joe Biden and Kamala Harris. This has finally shored up the Fast and The Furious vote for the Dems.

As a political independent & centrist, I’ve voted for both parties in the past. In this critical presidential election, I’m endorsing @JoeBiden & @KamalaHarris.

Progress takes courage, humanity, empathy, strength, KINDNESS & RESPECT.

We must ALL VOTE: https://t.co/rZi1mxh8DC pic.twitter.com/auLbc8xDBv

— Dwayne Johnson (@TheRock) September 27, 2020

Dax Shepard revealed that after a long history of sobriety he had a relapse.

When you get 16 years of sobriety, it can feel like it’s all behind you. But addiction is a patient
bastard and Opiods an easy lay.

Welcome back Dax.

Read more at cnn.com.

What’s the difference between kids from 20 years ago and kids today? “I think the craziest thing is just like what they did all day. Like they didn’t have YouTube back then. They didn’t have memes to share. The video games that they had were, like, Nintendo 64 and stuff. So I genuinely don’t know what they did all day.”

Poor Millennials. No youtube. No social media, and their video games sucked.

How did you live, man.

Read more at buzzfeed.

This “reality” were all living in is officially weirder than the movie Running Man.

The virtual Kelly Clarkson Show audience members awkwardly dancing to Vin Diesel's new song is the funniest thing I've seen in weeks. pic.twitter.com/eI0BEuNSPN

— Josh Kurp (@JoshKurp) September 25, 2020

Takes balls to admit your related to Betsy DeVos and it certainly takes real balls to wear pants like that.

Here is Betsy Devos' nephew, Ben Wierda on “Family Feud” the very moment he realizes how tight his pants are…pic.twitter.com/jkApboOkw0

— Rex Chapman🏇🏼 (@RexChapman) September 25, 2020

Michael Jackson’s cousin is planning to auction off what she claims is the IV drip that killed him. Marsha Stewart claims that she also has the tubing, the bag that administers drug and the King Of Pop’s bloodstain. The auction will take place in Vegas and its expected to get up to $2500. If she threw in one of MJ’s used alcohol swipes, she could get an even $3K.

Read more at tmz.

The world has fallen in the love with this little kitten rescued from the wild wires.
Not as cute as Mayo. But way better than Jeff.

Read more foxnews.com.

Someone caught on camera a God damn Boston Dynamics robot dog just wandering around on the street. Where there is one there are many.

guys look who i saw out on da street!!!:) pic.twitter.com/rPczxbWAkL

— ✨ nathan moved accounts (@bIoodtear) September 25, 2020

“Players only love you when they’re playin”’. And this dude just ain’t playin

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by @Doggface208 (@doggface208)

Poor Arnold Schwarzenegger did a shitty B movie and they thought his accent was so awful that they dubbed him. 15 years later he and his dub accent would rule Hollywood.

Awl Be Bock!

Via digg.

everything