Wednesday May 20: Daily Links

Published by Interrobang Staff at May 20, 2020

WEDNESDAY 5.20

NEWS STORIES

Now 75 Percent Agree Universal Healthcare Is Needed

They also think the government should be handing out monthly stipend checks

Back on the Yang Gang!

Pier 1 Imports is Closing Down for Good

After months in bankruptcy court, Pier 1, the retailer that was there for you when you decorated your first apartment says they’re getting out of the business and they’re not coming back.

End of an era. RIP to those awesome wicker egg chairs.

The 2021 Oscars Might Be Postponed

The Academy is planning on postponing the Oscars broadcast next year in 2021 with sources saying it’s more than likely. Or they can just have all the stars sit 6 chairs away from each other and seat fillers will be banned.

The Triple Crown has Been Rescheduled

The Triple Crown of horse racing has been rescheduled for June and will begin with the Belmont Stakes. Unfortunately, with the age of the average horse racing fan, no one will be able to watch it live.

2020 Triple Crown Schedule:

Belmont Stakes moves to June 20th
The Derby moves to September 5th
Preakness moves to October 3rd

We have derby prep races this weekend, and we will profit. Been profitable 6 out of the last 7 race days. ??

free chat: https://t.co/5X6ZdCt5BH pic.twitter.com/HEhKnKEukK

— Sports Betting Wiz (@WIZARDSPORTSCEO) May 20, 2020

Study Sez Most People Are Happier Making Big Decisions With A Coin Flip

A study found that people that made big life decisions based on a coin flip were happy with them six months later. Their next study will determine if participants successfully throwing a sock into the laundry basket has any effect on their decision making ability.

NYC Subways Getting A Ultraviolet Cleaning

NYC Subway cars are getting a thorough disinfecting while getting whole new Blade Runner vibe with ultra violet light.

Anyone willing to look at the F train under a black light is automatically a hero.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CAYznrRnW5b/?igshid=cy4y5ewb1jbg

Costco Employee is not Putting Up with Customer who Refuses To Wear A Mask

Uh oh, this toilet paper hoarder is about to share this video with his 3000 Instagram followers. Costco is sunk.

Wait, Chris?

Slow. Effing. Clap.

I’m signing up for a #Costco membership. That’s how you do it.

pic.twitter.com/mn5ar2b2m5

— The Brooklyn Archer, Allegedly (@elonjames) May 19, 2020

Texas Is Havin a Summer

Texas is going off and getting an early jump on grabbing some rays.

And it looks like hot dogs as well.

Via digg.

Not even SNL could not write something as ridiculous as this actual, real news report from my local station pic.twitter.com/VVTziwuyOd

— socially distant rendon (@maria_rendon97) May 18, 2020

The Governor Of Mississippi Gets Trolled Reading Off High School Grad Names

Harry Azcrac is a legend in that state, up there with Amanda Hugginkiss.

The governor of Mississippi just read a list of 2020 HS graduates during virtual-graduation and someone slipped-in the name "Harry Azcrac" on him…??? pic.twitter.com/Pk6oOvZOXW

— Rex Chapman?? (@RexChapman) May 19, 2020

SPORTS

Ex-Pizza Hut Boss Claims Jordan Food Poisoning Theory ‘Bunch of Crap’

When you are claiming that you didn’t give someone food poisoning and you the term ‘a bunch of crap,’ C’mon man

You ain’t helping.

LeBron James Nearly Signed With… The Dallas Cowboys?!?

LeBron James said that he was so concerned about the 2011 NBA lockout that he started working out for football – and was offered an NFL contract by Jerry Jones. Luckily for LeBron, the lockout came and went, and the unsigned NFL contract stills hangs on his wall. James would not comment on a report that he has open contract to play left field for the Cleveland Indians.

LeBron James To Produce Next Adam Sandler Movie

LeBron James will be co-producing Adam Sandler’s next Netflix film, ‘Hustle’. Sandler will an American basketball scout who gets unjustly fired, discovers a talent player overseas, and attempts to get them both back in the NBA. If the project is successful, Sandler is hoping to recruit James to star in a remake of the 1979 basketball cult classic, ‘Fastbreak’.

Horace Grant: 90% Of The Last Dance Is B.S.

While ESPN’s ‘The Last Dance’ was a critical and ratings hit, former Bull Horace Grant is still pissed at Michael Jordan for saying that Grant was the source behind Sam Smith’s book, ‘The Jordan Rules’. Grant called Jordan’s account ‘a downright, outright, completely lie’ and said that 90% of the doc was ‘B.S’. There’s only one way to settle this: A million dollar game of Horse.

ENTERTAINMENT

Danny Boyle, Michael B Jordan To Make Biblical Epic

Danny Boyle and Michael B. Jordan are teaming up for Methuselah, a movie based on the Biblical patriarch who lived to be 969 years old. Simon Beaufoy, who previous collaborated with Boyle on the Oscar-winning Slumdog Millionaire will write the script.
Producers are hoping to sign Denzel Washington to play God.

Grunge Rocker Tells Encounters With Kurt & Courtney, Chris Cornell and…Oasis?!?

His new memoir, Sing Backwards And Weep, former Screaming Trees frontman Mark Lanegan recalls Chris Cornell licking his bare eyeball, having a shotgun pointed at him by drug dealers, and called Oasis frontman Liam Gallagher, ‘a bothersome mosquito’. Lanegan also said that Kurt Cobain got so sick of ‘Smells Like Teen Spirit’ that he took Lanegan’s boot and threw it through the TV set when it aired on MTV. But Lanegan also thanked Courtney Love for paying his drug rehab bills. You know you’re messed up when Courtney Love ends up being the voice of reason.

Roger Waters Still Pissed At David Gilmour

Roger Waters slammed David Gilmour for not including Waters’ solo material on Pink Floyd’s social media pages. The former bassist claims that Gilmour considers him ‘irrelevant’, won’t post his updated version of Floyd classic ‘Mother’, but has posted the solo material of his wife, Polly Samson. Waters went on to say that Gilmour should ‘just change the name of the band to Spinal Tap, and then everything will be hunky dory’. Reps for Gilmour reportedly offered Waters the inflatable pig and some cash to make this all go away.

Dropkick Murphys, Springsteen To Play Fenway Park

The Dropkick Murphys will play a live-streamed concert from Fenway Park on May 29th. Bruce Springsteen will mark a special guest appearance by remote. It will mark the first time musicians will perform on the actual Fenway diamond, and first not have any Massholes in the audience.

Travis McCready and the Socially Distant Concert

This looks like as much fun as wearing a condom over a condom.

While masturbating.

Russia Has Their Own Shot For Shot Remake Of Malcolm In The Middle

Russia has their own Malcom In The Middle and it’s a shot for shot remake of the show that translated is called Super Max. A lot of the episodes deal with vodka and the proletariat though to keep people watching.