How An Internet Comedian Escaped The Battle of Political Correctness

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represents how a new generation of young comedians are making their way into the standup scene in the digital age. On December 10, Morgan will debut his original comedy special PREMATURE on Vimeo. Elliott is known for his hosting duties on popular shows like SourceFed, Mental_Floss, Buzzr, PopSugar, and Spike´s Lip Sync Battle. He’s now taking the plunge, after dabbling in stand up, and debuting his own comedy special exclusively on Vimeo On-Demand. He wrote this piece on battling political correctness, exclusively for The Interrobang. Scroll down for a preview of his new special

Internet Comedian Elliott Morgan Explains 5 Steps To Escape The Battle of Political Correctness

There is nothing worse than political correctness… besides genocide, racism, sexism, poverty, disease, and the film Avatar. These days, political correctness has come to represent a totalitarian dictator for those with out-of-shape persecution complexes. The rise against social justice warriors and their idiocy has given way to, ironically, a different kind of social justice warrior: someone who flippantly uses offensive language for no other reason than to show they can. Eff those bitches, am I right? See what I did there? With the… never mind.

In the world of comedy, political correctness has wreaked havoc. Whether it’s a silly YouTube video, a social media post, or an hour-long comedy special called Premature, I am acutely aware that there is an omnipresent risk of offending someone. As a product of web culture and specifically YouTube, political correctness is engrained in me. Political correctness is my guanine. It’s all up in my DNA. That might be the single stupidest metaphor ever, and I won’t be offended if you make fun of me for it. In fact, I’ll be disappointed if you don’t. Just don’t say “metaphor.” I prefer the term, “fakey talk.”

As a young and dumb Internet comedian, political correctness acts as a faceless boss who could fire me at any moment for even the smallest of infractions. I once made a quick post on Tumblr that included the phrase “head doctor.” My inbox was immediately filled with longwinded, rage-filled rants about how I was ostracizing those with mental illnesses. My reaction? Well, call me a pussy (Seriously. It wouldn’t be the first time. Sorry for not knowing what a “wrench” is, dad), but I felt bad. I felt truly regretful that my words could have hurt someone who was going through a very real struggle. If I had to pinpoint a moment, it would be then. That was when I stopped worrying about whether I was politically correct.

As I pored over these hateful messages, not a single one of them was from someone with a mental illness. Instead, they were from “social justice warriors.” What I see on the Internet now and in these politically-turbulent-but-come-on-so-entertaining times is not a battle between social justice warriors and propagators of free speech. I just see social justice warriors everywhere. Those who battle vehemently against political correctness solely because they view it as a great oppression are committing the same logical fallacies as those people who filled my Tumblr inbox. They’re just as angry, and their ideas are just as stupid. Maybe the thing most lacking on both sides of the political correctness war is humility, and I would know. I’m incredibly insightful and handsome.

Neil Gaiman said on Tumblr, because of course, “I started imagining a world in which we replaced the phrase ‘politically correct’ wherever we could with ‘treating other people with respect,’ and it made me smile.” That’s a very sweet thought, Neil, and I admire the sentiment. But bro, you’re wrong. Political correctness is not respect. On the contrary, and in my very humble opinion which could change tomorrow because opinions are funny like that, political correctness widens the distance between groups. A constant, totalitarian approach to language causes more oversimplifications. Political correctness does not protect groups from socially engrained stereotypes; it defines them by them. It locks those stereotypes away. It sweeps them under the rug and pretends they don’t exist. If you do that for long enough, you do not end up with a more inclusive world. You end up with an inauthentic one, where our beautiful differences are reduced to unspeakable taboos, and where Donald Trump and his hair are actual contenders for the White House.

I know what you’re thinking. This soapbox is really big. It’s expensive, too. I make a pretty good amount of money, so I invested in a leather-wrapped soapbox. If you’re gonna shove your opinions down someone’s throat, at least do it in style, I always say. Who invented the term “soapboax,” anyway? Probably some PC idiot with too much soap on his hands.

I no longer worry about offending people. If I hurt someone’s feelings, that’s a different matter. If I truly do emotional harm to them, that’s a different matter. I made this show on a YouTube channel called SourceFed. This show is called “The Study,” and it is hosted by a character named Elliott C. Morgan. Is my name Elliott Morgan? Yes, it is, and it’s very nice to meet you, but Elliott C. Morgan is a different beast. He’s offensive AF. Between my stand-up and The Study, I’ve learned a few things about how to escape the battle of political correctness.

Here is my five-step guide to escaping the battle of political correctness.

Accept that there are more important things to worry about. One of the greatest ironies of political correctness is that it’s usually bored, middle-class white people on Facebook who are talking about it. Whether you’re the biggest Tumblr-loving social justice warrior ever, or a Trump-lovin’, gun-toting Amurrican, nothing important has ever been said by bored white people on Facebook.

Know why you’re against it. Hey, tiger. You’re not a victim because someone told you how to speak. You’re not a patriot because you said “Muslin,” instead of “Muslim.” You’re just illiterate and you should go home. Political correctness simply doesn’t work. Do you light your air conditioner on fire if it breaks down? No. You try to fix it. You fail, because you’ve never even questioned how air conditioners work, but still. You get the point.

Comedy is your only hope. Make no mistake. Humor is the only thing that will save us from the clutches of political correctness, so go watch , drink a beer, hit your wife, and poop on the carpet.

Be nice, you idiot. That teenager with a Tumblr didn’t crap on your lawn, okay? Like a retarded puppy wandering into the Interstate, they meant well. Sure, now you’re guilt-laden and confused about how your day went all wrong, but don’t take it out on the puppy. Let the car wash do that.

Just. Stop. Talking. If you feel yourself getting on a soapbox about political correctness, kindly get off. Oh, wait… shit.

And there it is. The end of the article. Just like that. See, I realized I’ve been on quite the soapbox here, reiterating things you’ve probably heard a thousand times. But who knows, maybe you’ll share this on Facebook, and you’ll engage in a conversation that will never make any difference in the world ever. ß

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