Wednesday June 9: Daily Links

Published by Interrobang Staff at June 9, 2021

WEDNESDAY 6.9

NEWS STORIES

France President Slapped in the Face

President Macron took a slap to the face from a man in a green shirt who shouted, “Down with Macron-ism” and “Montjoie, Saint-Denis.”

These kids today are so soft. In my day we used to shoot the leaders we hated.

Pharmacist Who Sabotaged Vaccines Gets 3 Years in Jail

A guy who intentionally tampered with over 500 vials of Moderna vaccine will spend three years in jail. He was a flat-earther who believed the sky is “not real”. He also believed the vaccine would “turn off people’s birth control and make others infertile.”

Well, you always said follow the science.

NYT Editorial Board Member Says American Flags Disturb Her

A woman on the editorial NYT board confessed that seeing excessive amounts of American Flags can be disturbing as they have come to represent something different in this day and age than love for ones country.

One flag would be enough anywhere, and quite frankly, the number of flags you need in the bed of your pickup truck is: None.

7 Hammerhead Sharks Circle as Women Float on Rubber Raft

Seven sharks terrified beachgoers in Pensacola over Memorial Day weekend.

We’re going to need a bigger raft! Actually, raft size doesn’t matter. We’re screwed.

SPORTS

49er Rookies Get -The Talk- And It's not About Sex

When young players first move to San Francisco to play with the 49ers, they have to get a “talk” about how expensive housing is, and how they will need to rethink their housing goals. A chart showed that rent on a two bedroom apartment goes for $3250 as opposed to $700 or $1000 in some other markets, and a house that would go for $231,000 in Green Bay sells for almost $2 million in their new home town.

But you get amazing wifi.

LeBron James is the Most Hated Player in the NBA

When Lebron got the news he flopped on the ground and pretended he was hurt.

Nikola Jokic is the NBA MVP

The Denver Nuggets player was voted mvp by a landslide. He not only played in every game of the season, but put up incredible stats- one of the best statistical seasons in NBA history.

Nikola Jokic is named the MVP? Is this some kind of a sick Jokic?!

Aaron Rodgers is a No Show at Mandatory Packers Minicamp

Aaron Rodgers has decided to not show up for the Packers pre season minicamp and that means he’s officially a hold out. He is apparently now officially a starting limbo player at the Hawaiian resort he’s been staying at.

Jake Tapper Apologizes for Saying Temple of Doom is the Worst Spielberg Film

… because he forgot Crystal Skull Existed

Even though he may be right, this seems like the perfect time to say “hey stick to politics and let artists make art!!”

I few minutes ago I tweeted that Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom was Spielberg's worst movie. I was then reminded that Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull exists.

I had blotted that from memory.

I revise my remarks and regret the error.

— Jake Tapper (@jaketapper) June 8, 2021

NBC Says They’ll have 7000 hours Tokyo Olympics Coverage

The catch is it’s mostly going to be Equestrian Dressage broadcasts.

CELEBS & ENTERTAINMENT

Movie Pass Suits Found Sneaky Ways to Cheat Their Subscribers

Movie Pass seemed too good to be true and it was. The subscription that promised unlimited movies in theaters for $9.95 a month found that the model wasn’t really profitable, so they started fucking around with the accounts of their most active users. Technical problems were not really technical problems but intentional sabotage of accounts to slow down trips to the movies.

Aren’t movies are bad enough to turn us off going to the movies?

Mike Myers New Show Features Mike Myers, and Mike Myers, and Mike Myers, and Mike Myers.....and....Mike Myers. Also, Mike Myers and Mike Myers.

A new six-episode, half-hour comedy is heading for Netflix from the mind of Mike Myers. It’s titled “The Pentaverate” about a secret society of five men has been working to influence world events for the greater good since the Black Plague of 1347? Myers will play seven brand new characters

Hey Mike we’d be satisfied if you could just play one funny character.

Emily Ratajkowski Upsets The Internet With Baby Photo

People are scared and furious with Em’s casual stance holding her baby without supporting its head. Many are calling for child protective services to step in. Even Piers Morgan got involved, offering tips on how to hold a baby.

Relax, guys, this babies rich.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Emily Ratajkowski (@emrata)

Dogs and babies are not props for your ig photos, hold them with two hands. this has been a PSA @emrata pic.twitter.com/mbtT9TqyzZ

— 𝖘𝖕𝖎𝖓𝖊𝖑𝖑𝖎 (@LaurenM8123) June 7, 2021

THIS SHOULD’VE STAYED IN YOUR DRAFTS: Emily Ratajkowski gets backlash for how she’s holding her baby in this Instagram picture. Emily deactivated comments. One person on Twitter said “The way Emily Ratajkowski holds that baby should cause an immediate visit from CPS.” pic.twitter.com/DKxcXnVHzn

— Def Noodles (@defnoodles) June 7, 2021

Another person said “Why does Emily Ratajkowski hold living things including a baby like she’s holding extra shopping items under her arm.” pic.twitter.com/DIUecT1X8h

— Def Noodles (@defnoodles) June 7, 2021

Lindsey Buckingham and Wife Divorcing

The Fleetwood Mac guitarist is splitting from his wife of 24 years at the same time as he’s releasing a solo album.

So, no band, no wife, and you weight 89lbs. Lindsey do you ever have a good day?

Armie Hammer In Treatment

After a very high profile 2021, and not in a good way, Armie Hammer checked into a treatment center to deal with his myriad of drug, alcohol and sex issues.

He’s just 12 short steps away from giving up eating women. Step 1, we acknowledge that we’re powerless over our cannibalism.

Titus Burgess Supports Ellie Kemper

Kempers former Kimmie Schmidt costar posted on social media, “I love my Ellie ❤️, Oh, & P.S. Next time, just ask me, I’ll tell ya what to do 🥰 ”

He’s not just black he’s also gay so Ellie is in the clear.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Tituss Burgess (@instatituss)

Former Bachelor Host Threatened to Spill ALL the Dirt, Insiders Say

Sources told Page Six that former “The Bachelor” host Chris Harrison did not want to leave the show quietly. Allegedly, Harrison demanded a $25 million payout and threatened to go public with a lot of secrets about the show if his demands weren’t met.

David Spade can’t get here soon enough.

Kanye West's Weird $200 GAP Jacket: SOLD OUT

No zipper, no buttons, and they’re already gone.

Trump wants to know if you can make a pant for this.

Angelina Jolie Grabs Some Grays Papaya in NYC

Like a New Yorker, Jolie enjoys a hot dog and the paps go wild.

Grays is not only the name, its the color of the hot dog.

Gwyneth Paltrow And Apple Have A Piercing Tradition

Every year, birthday piercings

It’s less of a family and more of pincushion.

VIRAL VIRAL

Dog Tries to Race a Train Every Single Day

Lets just say he’s slower than a speeding bullet and weaker than a locomotive.

Via Digg.

STUDIES, SURVEYS, RANKINGS

70% Support Gay Marriage

It’s a record high for the US; 70% support same sex marriage.

And 30% of the people have seven flags on their pickup truck.