Thursday April 2: Daily Links

NEWS STORIES

 



Get Your Shake Shake Shack Fix By Mail!

Shake Shack announced that it’ll now mail customers eight patties, with buns, cheese and its special sauce, for $49. You can cook all of them and have your family wait in line for an hour for the REAL AUTHENTIC Shake Shack feel!

Read more at pagesix.com.



Booze Sales Surge During Corona Virus Outbreak

Alcohol sales rose 55% in the week ending March 21st. Tequila, gin and pre-mixed cocktails led the way with a 75% spike, with wine sales at 66% and beer at 42%. Online sales were up by 243%. Now we wait for that sales surge on products needed to cure hangovers.

Read more at fox5ny.com.



Dude Admits To Trying To Crash A Train Into Hospital Ship

Buzzfeed is reporting that A ” train engineer at the Port of Los Angeles targeted the hospital ship because he
thought it was “suspicious” and wanted to “wake people up.”

Can we stop being in an action movie now!? Please.

Read more at buzzfeednews.com.



SPORTS



Tua Tagovailoa Thinks He’s ‘100 percent’

Tua Tagovailoa has all the talent in the world and is ready to go high in the NFL draft.

Chances are high that he will get hurt watching game tape.

Read more at espn.com.



People Ain’t Happy With ESPN’s Movie Coach List

ESPN asked people who is their favorite movie coach of all tine and it set Twitter off in a fury, asking why their favorites weren’t in the running. Some of these guys didn’t even win the big game! How can a fictional coach be worth a dam without winning the big fictional game!



Robert Kraft Is Flying 1 Million N95 Masks To Massachusetts On The Pats Team Plane

Someone better check that jet to see if he smuggled any massage girls into the country on it.



Kid Gets The Old Hollywood Hogan Haircut From His Brother

When this kid asked his brother to give him a haircut his brother pulled a fast one and gave him a haircut that looks like male pattern baldness. Soon people everyone won’t say give me the Rachel, it will be “give me the Hogan!”. A two color died beard and mustache to come soon!

Read more at foxnews.com.



ENTERTAINMENT



Tom Hanks Sends Love To “That Thing You Do” Writer

Cause we
Could be happy, can’t you see?
If you’d only let me be the one to hold you
And keep you here with me

‘Cause I try and try to forget you, girl
But it’s just so hard to do
Every time you do that thing you do

Read more at avclub.com.



Who Watches MTV?

MTV’s been running the same reality shows for over a decade and Inside Hook is asking who is watching The Challenge, Teen Mom and Jersey Shore spin offs still? And who the channel is marketing towards? In a post coronavirus world they are now going to be busting out re runs of Room Raiders and are gonna hope for the best.

Read more at insidehook.com.



AV Club Lists The 50 Most Important American Independent Films

Why the fuck isn’t The Room on this list?

Read more at avclub.com.



Chuck D Says Public Enemy Split Was a Prank, Flavor Flav Says Fuck That

Chuck D started off April Fools Day saying the group splitting up was all a big joke to promote a new album but Flavor Flav gas come out to disagree with that and say there’s too much shit going on in the world right now to be making jokes to promote albums. Yes … Flavor Flav is the voice of reason here.

Read more at pitchfork.com.



Samuel Jackson Reads Stay The F**k At Home

Samuel Jackson went on Jimmy Kimmel to read ‘Stay The F**k at Home, a COVID-19 based update of the best selling book ‘Go The F**k To Sleep. Rep for Jackson denied reports that he offered a chance to read ‘Shut The F**k Up’ in place of White House Press Briefings.



Artists’ Weed Side Hustle Is Doing Big Business.

Carlos Santana, Willie Nelson, Snoop Dogg, B-Real Of Cypress HIll and Jenny Lewis invested early in cannabis dispensaries in California, Washington and Colorado and business has never been better. Kid Rock is trying to fast track a N95 mask that has a beer funnel.

https://www.billboard.com/articles/business/9348354/cypress-hill-santana-coronavirus-marijuana



GOING VIRAL



Dog Hates April Fools

Look we all like jokes. Yeah we like jokes except when we are hungry. Meat hungry.

I’m one generation from being wolf. No more jokes.

Via digg.com.

@哈K♬ original sound – 哈K



It’s A Tiger Fight!

This never would have happened if Joe Exotic coulda got his hands on these guys.

Via digg.



Drone Army Puts Out A Fire

If drones take fire fighters jobs no one will buy a calendar of sexy robots every year.

Via YouTube.



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