Saturday September 19: Daily Links
SATURDAY 9.19
NEWS STORIES
Marco Rubio Wants Permanent Florida Daylight Saving Time
Marco Rubio and Senator Rick Scott have filed a bill to keep Florida on daylight saving time all the time for the coming year.
Work all night on a drink of rum
Daylight come and me wan’ go home
Stack banana ’til de mornin’ come
Daylight come and me wan’ go home
Bill Gates Thinks Travel Ban May Have Spread Coronavirus
Bill Gates thinks the travel ban caused a run at our airports that forced the rona on us us all. He wants to combat it with a chip in our brains to turn us liberal.
Thousands Gather at Supreme Court for Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg
Crowds gathered to mourn the loss of Ruth Bader Ginsburg. Badass fighter till the end.
The No- no-no Notorious RBG
This is the scene at the Supreme Court tonight after the death of Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
Thousands of people are gathered here, with hundreds sitting on the steps https://t.co/Cg9oNILOPx 📷: @evansemones #RBG #SCOTUS pic.twitter.com/kw1xGBLl3m
— POLITICO (@politico) September 19, 2020
So Many Hurricanes This Year They’ve Ran Out of Names
For the second time in history, we’re moving to the Greek Alphabet for hurricane names because we’ve run out of letters.
How about a we just switch to numbers? Let’s call the next one, say…. 2020?
2 Million Weirdos Are Still Getting Netflix DVDs Delivered to Their Home
There are more questions than answers here. Who are you?? Are you stuck in a time warp?? Are you the one responsible for saving USPS??
SPORTS
Giannis Antetokounmpo Wins the NBA MVP Again
The Bucks Giannis Antetokounmpo just won back to back MVP awards. Luckily the NBA picks the player before the
playoffs because he goes from the ‘ Greek Freak” to freak on a leash.
Six Year Old Is a Boss in Texas Football
Every once in awhile a six year old comes a long with the body of a full grown man. A grown man that can’t color in the lines.
Some Etiquette Tips on Social Interaction in the Age of Covid
To be clear: Is open mouth kissing hello totally off the table?
ENTERTAINMENT
Early Reviews Claim That Ratched Stinks On Ice
The reviews are in and they hate Ratched as much as Mac did. Maybe we all need a large Native American to put a my pillow over our face.
Lori Loughlin’s Prison Will Provide Yoga And Music Lessons
Lori Loughlin is going to prison for her role in the college admissions scandal, but this facility will be offering offer yoga, Pilates, and music lessons instead of hard labor. Aunt Becky isn’t going to jail, she’s going on an extended vacation.
Britney Spears Sees The World Upside Down
Britney Spears posted a new video walking on her hands and saying that seeing the world upside down is way better. Coming soon: The Britney Spears Challenge where today’s pop stars have to sing their hits doing handstands.
Van Morrison To Release Three Anti-Lockdown Songs
Van Morrison will be releasing three songs protesting the lockdowns imposed during the pandemic. Morrison has been a vocal critic of the shutdown saying its based on ‘pseudoscience’ and ‘crooked facts’. The working title of the EP: It’s Too Late To Get Sick Now.
Queen Elizabeth Strips Harvey Weinstein Of Prestigious Honor
Queen Elizabeth has ordered that Harvey Weinstein be stripped of his CBE, which was awarded to him back in 2004 for his contributions to the British film industry. Weinstein is probably sitting in his cell saying, ‘Her son has sex with young girls and I’m getting stripped? WTF!’
GOING VIRAL
nothing here yet
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