Monday May 31: Daily Links

Published by Interrobang Staff at May 31, 2021

MONDAY 5.31

NEWS STORIES

Airlines Ditching Alcohol

Both American and Southwest airlines are taking a hiatus from serving alcohol hoping the change will help to curb the surge in violence on planes.

Excuse me, but the Alcohol is the only thing on a flight that doesn’t cause rage….

Need a Porta Potty? Good Luck

The latest shortage is porta potties. The huge influx of outdoor events has created so much demand that manufacturers can’t crank them out fast enough.

We’d better get those porta potties or the shit is going to hit the fan.

DNA Test Your Dog!

Now once you’re finishing exploring your own heritage with a DNA test, you can get one for your furry best friend. Learn everything there is to know about Fido’s pedigree.

Did we really need this? Dogs smelling each others butts seemed to have been working just fine.

Check Out The Galaxy's Downtown

NASA has released a stunning new picture of our galaxy’s violent, super-energized “downtown” area, aka The center of the Milky Way

Looks nice but Downtown seems to be so filled with hipsters all the time.

Cali Girl Becomes Youngest Mensa Member at 2

Kashe Quest can name all of the elements on the periodic table, identify all 50 states and decipher patterns. She also tested at a 146 IQ.

Unfortunately she still shits her pants.

Mass Shooting Manifesto Seems to Just Be a Prank, Possibly Swatting

Somebody posted a promise to kill in the City of Lakewood. The posted manifesto was titled “MASS SHOOTING TODAY IN LAKEWOOD” and went on to describe how the author claimed to have been bullied every day, with no job, and no meaning in their life. The author, claimed to be black, but hate minorities, and said they would go out and shoot everyone in site on May 30. The user also posted a photo of a handgun to accompany the open letter, plus a clip of ammo.

Police are saying its a Prank, and may even be a swatting incident.

Prank??????? Anyone seen Steve O?

SPORTS

It Costs $15,000 To Snub the Press in Tennis

Naomi Osaka warned that she wouldn’t be talking to media at the French Open and followed through. Their response, so far, was to fine her $15,000 after she refused to talk to press for mental health reasons in a post game press conference. And she’s just fine with that, writing “Anger is a lack of understanding. change makes people uncomfortable,”

$15,000 is money well spent to avoid talking to the press.

City of Orlando Wants LeBron James to Give Them a Chance

LeBron James tweeted that it’s nothing personal but he won’t go back to Orlando, and there’s no chance he would play there. He has PTSD from the Bubble time. The Orlando Magic took it personally, and so did the entire city.

“I’m certain that you didn’t experience the other half of Orlando during your time in the bubble last summer, @KingJames. Next time you’re here, let’s go out for lunch.”

You’ll see that our community is diverse, inclusive and vibrant.

Orlando is Disney’s Bitch and it always has been.

Braves’ Marcell Ozuna Arrested for Assaulting His Wife

Police witnessed The Braves Outfielder choking his wife and throwing her against the wall, and striking her. He was charged with aggravated assault by strangulation and family violence,

Sadly it’s the only big hit he’s had all year.

Celtics Fan Hurls Water Bottle at Kyrie Irving

Kyrie gets a bottle of water, Westbrook gets popcorn, maybe in the next playoff game one of these a-hole fans will throw M&M peanuts and they can have a movie night.

CELEBS & ENTERTAINMENT

Courtney Cox Recreates THE ROUTINE With Ed Sheeran

We finally found somebody duller than ross.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Courteney Cox (@courteneycoxofficial)

Amy Schumer and John Krackzinski's Friendly Flirt on IG

She joked his marriage is just a publicity stunt. The press ooooohed and aaahhhhed. He thanked her for exposing “the truth”

Amy’s just jealous cause she has no idea how to be quiet.

VIRAL VIRAL

Did You Know Hippos Can’t Swim??? They RUN UNDER WATER

Spielberg messed up, Jaws should have been a hippo movie!

Alright I had to do some YouTube digging to see what was really going on with Hippos in the water. Apparently they can’t even swim. They’re so strong and muscular they sink to the surface run on the ground underwater and jump up to the surface when they’re chasing something 😮 https://t.co/iZjWIH3zgK pic.twitter.com/lz5wQlGO5A

— Matthew A. Cherry (@MatthewACherry) May 30, 2021

STUDIES, SURVEYS, RANKINGS

Florida Manatees Are in Trouble

Manatees are dying at an alarming rate in Florida. We’ve lost at least 749 Florida manatees in 2021 so far, and decades of environmental stress are to blame.

Face it, manatees really don’t do a lot to help keep themselves alive.

Gun Ownership Climbed During Lockdown and Still Growing

This really makes it a little more nerve racking to try to go out and enjoy White Boy Summer.

Mental Floss Ranks the Best Movie Trailers of all Time

In a world…. where the trailer is riveting it spoils 90% of the movie so there’s no point in seeing it..