Monday April 27: Daily Links (Plus Weekend Links)
MONDAY 4.27
NEWS STORIES
New Zealand Claims Coronavirus Has Been Eliminated There
New Zealand is easing restrictions on their population after new coronavirus cases have dropped down in single digits. too bad flights to New Zealand now cost the same price as season tickets to an NFL game.
Read more at cnn.com.
When Lockdown Is Lifted Americans are Gonna Roam
This should come as a shock to no one. As soon as it’s safe Americans are going to hit that Holiday Road.
We are sick of selfies in our kitchen.
Read more at nypost.com.
South Korea Says Kim Jong Un Alive And Well
South Korea is now reporting Kim Jong Un is alive and well and not in a vegetative state or dead. Turns out 3 packs a day, a handle of Hennessy and a fearful population is all you need for good health.
Read more at cnn.com.
SPORTS
Jameis “Crab Legs” WInston Is Going To The Saints
Jameis WInston is going to the Saints to back up Drew Brees as he’s signing a one year contract. It’s in his contract that if he steals any gumbo he’s out of New Orleans.
Read more at si.com.
Knicks To Play Jeremy Lin Highlights In Lieu Of Fresh Basketball
MSG Network is going to play Jeremy Lin highlights Monday night which will be the first ever acknowledgment that Lin was on the team since he left. If this hadn’t worked out, they’d have ended up playing JD and the Straight Shot videos.
Read more at nypost.com.
Knicks To Play Jeremy Lin Highlights In Lieu Of Fresh Basketball
MSG Network is going to play Jeremy Lin highlights Monday night which will be the first ever acknowledgment that Lin was on the team since he left. If this hadn’t worked out, they’d have ended up playing JD and the Straight Shot videos.
Read more at nypost.com.
Is New Pats Kicker A Raging Racist?
A kicker the Patriots drafted is being accused of being part of The Three Percenters, a right wing militia group, after he was spotted having a tattoo with a similar marking to their cause. He is now going to get it covered up with a Robert Kraft Massage Parlor sleeve.
Read more at espn.com.
ENTERTAINMENT
Phoebe Waller-Bridge Wall Of Cocks
Was going to write something funny here but you already clicked the video and left.
Read more at vulture.com.
‘Mandalorian’ Roundtable Documentary Looks a lot Like ‘Dinner For Five’
Looks Like Jon Favreau ripped himself off by bringing his old Dinner For Five chestnut to Disney.
We won’t complain as long as you promise not to begin in Vince Vaughn.
Via digg.
Michael Madsen Sends Us A Message From Quarantine
Stay home, or else Mr. Blonde is gonna make you scotch tape a napkin to your head.
Chrissy Teigen Attacked For Having Square Body
Chrissy Teigen posted a picture of herself in a bathing suit and people online are attacking her for having a square body when everyone knows the rhombus shaped body is the most attractive.
Read more at dailymail.co.uk.
Everyone used to….surgically enhanced curves. I’ve been a square my whole life and let me tell you, it’s paid off nicely in many ways! https://t.co/wuRwGof2sZ
— chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) April 26, 2020
don’t get too trapped pic.twitter.com/bLp3dlHzIg
— chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) April 26, 2020
Sofia Vergara Has A Lot In Common With Her Much Younger Niece
Sofia Vergara took a pic with her niece who’s 20 years younger than her and there’s just something about it that seems familiar. Weird.
Read more at dailymail.
Meryl Streep Makes A Martini During Sondheim Tribute
Meryl Streep, Audra McDonald, and Christine Baranski appeared via Zoom to sing ‘Ladies Who Lunch’ during a live stream to mark the 90th Birthday of composer Stephen Sondheim. Streep stole the performance by making – and taking a healthy swig of – a martini. There’s now an online petition for her to sing ‘The Piano’s Been Drinking’ to salute Tom Waits.
Read more at hollywoodlife.com.
The perfection aka Christine Baranski , Meryl Streep and Audra McDonald ladies and gentlemen #Sondheim90Concert pic.twitter.com/Tr9fAqOqaa
— Olivia Colman’s Blonde Hair (@streep_lover) April 27, 2020
High Demand For Celebs To Drop In On Zoom Happy Hours
Industry insiders say that demand is so high for big name celebrities to do digital
drop-ins during Zoom happy hours that they are considering setting up a service similar to Cameo. Reps for Rob Gronkowski are already pushing for him to be available for an after-hours party package.
Read more at pagesix.com.
Dolly Parton Secretly Produced Buffy The Vampire Slayer
Fans of the 90s show Buffy The Vampire Slayer are freaking out over the news that Sandollar Entertainment, which produced the series, was co-founded by Dolly Parton. Reps did deny reports that Pat Boone shadow produced Xenia: Warrior Princess.
Read more at nypost.com.
Maybe It Will Help to Kylie Jenner in a Tight White Dress
We know, it’s tough being on lock down but Kylie Jenner is bringing some light into the darkness
Saint Kylie of Reality
Read more at yahoo.com.
GOING VIRAL
Supercut: Celebs Getting Ripped Off On Sneakerhead Show
The new version of this show will be celebrities buying branded toilet paper and N95 masks.
Via digg.com.
Naked Man Dances Naked On New York City Rooftop
Cameras captured a naked man doing a socially distanced dance in the rain on a New York City rooftop. There were several unconfirmed reports that it was a recent NFL draft pick expressing his joy over not being selected by the Jets.
Read more at tmz.com.
Roof Culture during Quarantine in NYC pic.twitter.com/uO2tREheMu
— Jeremy Cohen (@jerm_cohen) April 18, 2020
WEEKEND STORIES/strong>
NEWS STORIES
Glowing Dolphins!!
Yes nerds, put your hands down There is a reason for this natural phenomenon.
Is it better to just say MAGIC.
Read more at abc7ny.com.
Coronavirus Shutdown has One Million Kegs of Beer Going Stale
A big part of the beer industry sales are concerts, stadiums, live events, and bars and with the coronavirus shut down around one million kegs of beer are going stale. What are they going to do with them???
I volunteer as tribute!
Read more at wsj.com.
SPORTS
Peloton Sets Massive Record with 23,000 users in a Single Live Streamed Class
You all laughed when they put out that weird Christmas ad but guess who’s laughing all the way to the bank?
Founder and CEO, Mr. Joe Peloton.
Read more at mashable.com.
Aaron Rodgers Has a Few Words For That You Packers QB Draft Pick
Aaron Rogers on the Packers drafting a QB: “They’re not going to be able to beat me out anytime soon.”
You just got Discount Double Checked, bitch.
Read more at yahoo.com.
ENTERTAINMENT
Great News : Kanye West is Officially A Billionaire!
It’s so wonderful when good things happen to good people!
One thing is for sure, he’s definitely going to be humble about it.
Read more at forbes.com.
Andre Leon Talley Drags Anna Wintour
André Leon Talley ‘huge emotional and psychological scars’ from his decades long friendship with Vogue’s editor Anna Wintour.
Hell hath no fury like a morbidly obese man.
Read more at dailymail.co.uk.
George Lucas’ Weird Serve For ‘Return of the Jedi’
George Lucas’s original’ ending for ‘Return of the Jedi’ was for Luke to put on Vader’s helmet and scream “Now I am Vader.”
Wahhhh George Lucas almost really really ruined my childhood!
Read more at yahoo.com.
h4>A Look at All the Original Netflix Series Cancelled So Far This Year
A final goodbye to all the less than satisfactory shows Netflix laid to rest this year.
In retrospect, AJ and the Queen really shouldn’t have gone with that cliff hanger ending.
Read more at google news.
Richard Gere Dad Again at Age 70
Now before you get upset that Richard Gere is little old to be a dad….rest easy knowing the step dad will be much younger.
So everyone wins.
Read more at popculture.com.
Chris Hemsworth as Hulk Hogan !?
“I am a real American
fight for the rights of every man
I’m a real American
fight for what’s right
fight for your life”
Read more at screenrant.com.
Beatles vs Stones 2020
In response to Paul McCartney’s recent comments that The Beatles were a better band than the Stones, Mick Jagger responded that ‘one band is unbelievably luckily still playing in stadiums, and then the other band doesn’t exist’. We’re still waiting for a Ringo vs Charlie Watts air drum battle.
Read more at rollingstone.com.
Seth MacFarlane Calls Out Oprah For Promoting Dr.Phil, Dr Oz and Jenny McCarthy
Seth wants you to know that sure Oprah did some good shit but still she brought some assholes to national fame.
In other news, Family Guy sucks.
Via digg.
Eddie Van Halen Went Gangsta On Fred Durst
According to a new book, a 2001 collaboration between Limp Bizkit and Eddie Van Halen ended so badly that Van Halen put a gun to Fred Durst’s head until all of Eddie’s gear was safely packed into his assault vehicle. Now we know who’s the real life Nice Guy Eddie!
Read more at toofab.com.
Alt-Rock Band Revisits Classic 80s Videos Moments
For their video ‘No Secrets’, the Canadian alt-rock band The Treble recreates moments from classic 80s videos with remarkable detail. For their next clip, the band is going to do a frame for frame remake of ‘November Rain’.
Via digg.
GOING VIRAL
Budweiser Updates The Whassup Ads
Using new audio, Budweiser is now airing the classic ‘Whassup’ ads as a reminder to check up on people during quarantine. Reps declined to comment on whether or not they are bringing back Spuds Mackenzie to promote social distancing.
Read more at thedrum.com.
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