The Future of Weight Loss
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Fuck diets, fuck lap band surgery, fuck exercise. All you’re going to need to lose weight will be Aspire Bariatrics. How’s it work? It uses Aspiration Therapy which includes installing a “port” onto the outside of your skin which leads to your stomach. You then place a tube inside the port that leads to your stomach which will drain out food you just ate. Eat something horrible for you, wait 20 minutes, and hit the draining machine – it takes out 1/3 of the calories you just ate.
Finally, the answer to obesity has been found. All you have to do is suck all the food you eat out of your stomach through a shop vac and you don’t have to worry about shit.’
Read more at aspirebariatrics.com.
