The Eight Greatest Post-Game Rants in Sports History

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In addition to likely traumatizing Erin Andrews, Richard Sherman’s epic postgame “Don’t You Ever Talk About Me” rant Sunday spawned dozens of Internet memes and divided the nation into two camps – the “Sherman Has No Class Party” and the “It Ain’t Bragging if You Can Back It Up Party.” Sherman’s tirade was memorable, but it had nothing on some of the all-time great postgame rants. Here are 8 rants, blow-ups, and meltdowns that blow Sherman out of the water.

Note: These are all postgame interviews, not to be confused with in-game ejections and courtside breakdowns.

#8: Barry Hinson: “Size Doesn’t Matter.”

The Southern Illinois men’s basketball coach turned his post-game press conference into open mic night at the Chuckle Hut in a memorable 2013 tirade, complete with dick jokes and a topical SEAL Team 6 sniper reference. Add your own rim shots. All right everyone, put your hands together for Mr. Hinson. Tip your waitstaff. Try the mozzarella sticks.

#7:  Dennis Green: “They Are What They Thought They Were.”

The Arizona Cardinals Coach gets an A in metaphysical philosophy with his insightful observation on perception and reality. Years before the phrase “It is what it is” entered the common lexicon, Dennis Green said that the Chicago Bears played exactly as expected, then pimp-slapped the microphone and walked off.

#6:  Hal McRae: “Don’t Ask Me Those Stupid-Ass Questions.”

Kansas City Royals Coach Hal McRae’s 1993 meltdown has the rare distinction of actually drawing blood, as a local reporter was left sporting the crimson mask after apparently being struck by debris during the “Hal Must Smash” breakdown. McRae went from zero-to-100, as he started throwing tape recorders and telephones moments after calmly answering questions, leaving a group of stunned (and bloodied) reporters in his wake.

#5: Jim Schoenfeld: “Have Another Doughnut!”

Poor Don Koharski. The hockey referee was permanently branded a doughnut-loving fat pig after a run-in with New Jersey Devils coach Jim Schoenfeld after a 1988 playoff loss to the Boston Bruins. Slapshot’s Reg Dunlop couldn’t have handled the situation any better. That’s Old Time Hockey.

#4 Mike Gundy: “I’m a Man. I’m 40!”

Oklahoma State Coach Mike Gundy should have been happy after a win over Texas Tech. Instead, he was furious about a newspaper article that was critical of one of his players. What followed was an awkward postgame speech where Gundy paced like a caged tiger and channeled Molly Shannon’s SNL character Sally O’Malley in his midlife crisis rant.

#3: Jim Mora: “Playoffs?! Playoffs?”

The rant that can be summed up in one incredulous word: “Playoffs?!” Mora reacts to a reporter’s question about making the postseason as if he was just asked whether Bigfoot is real. This one sound bite has become Mora’s lasting legacy. Rarely has a coach so openly showed such pessimism and disdain for his own team.

#2: Mike Tyson: “I Want to Eat Your Children. Praise be to Allah.”

“Iron Mike” starts off dedicating his victory to a friend who has passed away, and then ramps things up, declaring that he is simultaneously Alexander the Great, Sonny Liston, and Jack Dempsey. Then he goes off the rails for good, going all super-Muslim cannibal. What can we say? The man’s style is impetuous.

#1: Lee Elia “They Can Kiss My Fucking Ass.”

The Chicago Cubs manager had all he could take of the hometown fans when he unleashed an f-bomb filled attack on Cubs Nation following a 1983 loss to the Los Angeles Dodgers. “The mother-fucks don’t even work! That’s why they’re out at the fucking games,” Elia said of the few thousand fans that bothered up to support the local team. We can only presume that this rant put the kibosh on any potential speeches on behalf of the Chicago Chamber of Commerce.

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Dan Murphy is a freelance writer in Buffalo. Pre-order his new book documenting the rise of women’s wrestling from sideshow to WWE main event on Amazon.com, "Sisterhood of the Squared Circle: The History and Rise of Women’s Wrestling"
Dan Murphy
Dan Murphy
Dan Murphy is a freelance writer in Buffalo. Pre-order his new book documenting the rise of women’s wrestling from sideshow to WWE main event on Amazon.com, "Sisterhood of the Squared Circle: The History and Rise of Women’s Wrestling"