Not Enough Room in the Lifeboat: WWE Headliners


 

The WWE Ship is Sinking and Uh Oh, There’s Only Room For 3…

Just imagine. Four WWE Headliners, all on one ship. But oh shit, the ship is sinking. Andre the Giant, Hulk Hogan, Stone Cold Steve Austin and The Rock  are about to go down with the ship. There’s a lifeboat, but there’s only room for three of them. Which headliner doesn’t get a seat?

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84 comments
JonnyKozicz
JonnyKozicz

Why would anyone vote of Andre?! He was always business first like Austin and the Rock and hogan was always more worried about him being top guy. Hogan took his ball and left when he was supposed to put over Bret Hart after WM9 for the title and never did before he left. He is in business for himself and the others knew that the business is first.

Derwood OMalley
Derwood OMalley

Get a life - LifeBoat is a thoughtful analysis of talent.  Wrestling is just stupid, mindless Bull Shit. 

galactictraveler
galactictraveler

Can we send the entire WWE on a cruise and torpedo the ship !

fitzyMFNcent
fitzyMFNcent

did Fez do his Andre the Giant impression?

SarahMcPants
SarahMcPants

I've never watched wrestling so I'm gonna need to see tape of the other 3 banging Bubba the Love Sponge's wife before I can make a decision.

HarvesterOfSorrow
HarvesterOfSorrow

Fez and Sam's reasons for keeping Andre instead of Rock are asinine. Andre wasn't the first major attraction in wrestling. Gorgeous George was before him. Sammartino was before him. The only major impact Andre made was Wrestlemania 3, but you don't need Andre the Giant to make Wrestlemania 3 possible. That was all about Hogan. The 3 biggest names in wrestling history are Rock, Austin, and Hogan. There's no debating that. Andre has to go. Besides, like someone else said, you put Andre into any era after the one he was in and he's not a major draw. Rock, Flair, and Austin are the 3 greatest because they could fit into any era. Hogan adapts better than Andre, but not as well as the others. He was hype. He's not a great talent, but he still gets to stay because he's better than Andre. 

Bane1198
Bane1198

Andre your big ass is swimming. Can't have no giant tard sinking the ship.

Tonyboy3
Tonyboy3

Andre isnt a headliner who made this list? It sucks! Should have been Hulk Austin Rock & Savage

John in va
John in va

Sam shut the hell upp cant standd ya

SeanAXP
SeanAXP

here it is, if you're saving people, you gotta save those that would make an impact today. Andre has no real talent, just huge. The "sport" is far more athletic, and Andre couldn't handle it

 

FLpro
FLpro

Let them just have a Gay-Off!

BadNewsJeff
BadNewsJeff

Looking at Hulk makes me want to eat hot dogs.  Does that make me gay or a canibal?

jloneblackheart
jloneblackheart

Hulk goes. I bet the others have the common sense to not eat like a pig before fucking their friends wife.

DeathProof
DeathProof

If all of the lifeboat bits were on a life boat this one would be thrown out first.

Xacjed
Xacjed

I liked the Rock in Be Cool. Never saw him wrestle though. I was an adult by then.

bioinsegnante
bioinsegnante

Why do I seem to be the only one who wants to throw Stone Cold out?  Andre and Hogan are legends and the Rock is the only true star that has maintained a career outside of wrestling.  What has Stone Cold done aside from shotgun beers inside the ring?  He's a loser and he's ejected!

Narc Zito
Narc Zito

I blame Sam Roberts for the demise of the AFRO Show.

Ray in Pittsburgh
Ray in Pittsburgh

I'd jump so I wouldn't have to put up with the other assholes.

Goonerfan
Goonerfan

I think we should torpedo the life boat.

jerkstoresean
jerkstoresean

I'd tell The Rock to skip on outta there!! Lololololol

Necks
Necks

Because Andre is dead!

DeathProof
DeathProof

What adult watches wrestling? I never had even a slight desire to watch it as a child.

Brobocop
Brobocop

Gotta be The Rock. Hogan and Andre put WWE on the map at Wrestlemania III. Without Stone Cold there would be no Rock. Rock only really carried the WWE for a few years when Austin left. The Rock never really defined a generation of wrestling.

Steve in Tampa
Steve in Tampa

Legitimate film star?  No Holds Barred, Suburban Commando, Mr. Nanny, all masterpieces of modern film.

DeathProof
DeathProof

These pricks wouldn't last 5 minutes at a Madball show!

HoneydewWilkins
HoneydewWilkins

Don't forget, the lifeboat is actually the Thunder in Paradise boat so it can't be Hogan

Narc Zito
Narc Zito

Stone Cold is safe, because without him, we never get Stone Cold ET.

ElectricDave
ElectricDave

Can we kick Fez out of the life boat? He is ruining the show. He has to be the only radio show host in history that 80% of his audience is against him

tfor3
tfor3

Andre goes.   Great force but no mic skills no wrestling skills.  Until the Hogan push he was midcard at best

 

SLEEPYDOG
SLEEPYDOG

@Derwood OMalley HEY MOTHERFUCKER WRESTLING IS... oh wait, you're right

Foggy_Otis
Foggy_Otis

@K Dubya I'd keep Andre just for being in The Princess Bride!

John in va
John in va

@DeathProof ammem.and sams voice fuckkin sucks and is awefulll

HarvesterOfSorrow
HarvesterOfSorrow

The Rock carried the WWE just as long as Austin did. 2000-mid 2002, he was the guy. Austin was late 97-99. And you don't need Andre for Wrestlemania III. That Mania was about Hogan's star, and you could've built an angle with someone else and it would've been huge, too. Andre didn't define any era, either. And he's easily the least talented of the 4. He's got to go. The Rock stays.

LizSetsFire
LizSetsFire

@DeathProof they're too bulky for spin kicks.

John in va
John in va

@notbubba not jealous hes a waist of time on the air....

notbubba
notbubba

 @John in va  you want my dna too ya creepy ma'fucka... fuck off. Sam's the future of the channel. get used to it stupid

 

John in va
John in va

@notbubba how old are you and what year is this lmfao lmfaoo....

notbubba
notbubba

 @John in va  your dad shoulda pulled out and came on your mom's tits and then farted...that's what that means

 

John in va
John in va

@notbubba wth does that even mean.lmfaoo