Why Are Stores Across the Country Locking Down their Stock of Tide Detergent!?


No, this isn’t the Onion reporting.  We checked, read the story again, and rechecked to see if this was just a joke.  But it’s not a joke–  there is a nationwide Tide Crime Spree taking place all over the country.  And nobody is exactly sure why, but there have been reports of thieves loading up carts with the liquid detergent and dashing out the door.  Okay, we’ll admit, we still think this story is fake, but here’s what’s being reported:

  • In Minnesota a man has been accused of stealing $25,000 worth of Tide over a few months.
  • It is reportedly being traded for drugs according to investigators in Maryland.
  • “There’s no serial numbers and it’s impossible to track,” said Detective Larry Patterson of the Somerset, Ky., Police Department, where authorities have seen a huge spike in Tide theft. “It’s the item to steal.”
  • “These are criminals coming into the store to steal thousands of dollars of merchandise,” said Detective Harrison Sprague of the Prince George’s County, Md., Police Department, where Tide is known as “liquid gold” among officers.
  • “They’ll do it right in front of a cop car — buying heroin or methamphetamine with Tide,” said Detective Rick Blake of the Gresham Police Department. “We would see people walking down the road with six, seven bottles of Tide. They were so blatant about it.”

You can read more at the33tv.com or abclocal.com or nj.com or citybeat.com and so on.

50 comments
Yuuuck
Yuuuck

Shenanigans.  

TyWanon
TyWanon

For Fuck Sake, thanks for stealing my handle--they all want to "Tide One On"

The Real Big Ed
The Real Big Ed

It's a tidal wave of crime! Who will clean up this mess?  Who will blot this stain on the country? How can we stem the tide of criminality?  Is money laundering involved? Is somebody being taken to the cleaners?  I gotta million of them, just like these ones, here...

TyWanon
TyWanon

I heard they are cutting it with Cough Syrup for a real High Tide

Johnny Dickshot
Johnny Dickshot

The irony here is that OWS has found a way to put soap into their bodies without getting any ON their bodies. Hipster douchebags are going to make my cleaning products illegal. They took my bath salts from me!!! My bath salts for Fluke's sake!!!

shrekkalove
shrekkalove

I didn't know poor people washed their clothes.

gavin_b
gavin_b

This is clearly part of a money laundering scheme.

Gripper
Gripper

Well, the green capped bottle does say 'free' on it.

Z. Stardust
Z. Stardust

They're WISKing it right out the door

Ralphieboy
Ralphieboy

 the cops said the crooks were caught blue handed... or somthin..tss.tss

SH4RKYx
SH4RKYx

Yeah just sounds like bullshit

Ralphieboy
Ralphieboy

They call that shit blue gold in the hood

DeathProof
DeathProof

"The tide is high...i'm holding on!"

maxxcorbin
maxxcorbin

Blow up the moon....that will get rid of tide.

DeathProof
DeathProof

its actually being called "Liquid Gold" by law enforcement agencies and dealers who accept it as payment for drugs.

cigarsNscotch
cigarsNscotch

Drug dealers are using it to launder their money.

Fufurfmly
Fufurfmly

Brilliant marketing campaign!

ShoutOutDesign
ShoutOutDesign moderator

Damnit. I invested all my money in Snuggle and now I'm finished.

Cletus from Brooklyn
Cletus from Brooklyn

It's only going to be a matter of time before they figure out that the only thing you really need is the container. Then fill it with any cheap brand.

bmqq316
bmqq316

Maybe a high school kid needs them to store beer in because he promised Emma Stone he'd get it for her party.

Riverguy
Riverguy

Check out that woman from 'Unusual Addictions'.  she probably spawned a cult following.

Riverguy
Riverguy

Ever since Billy Mays died and Oxyclean with him the world has gone to hell!

pipeloader
pipeloader

ts, maybe these guys need to clean up their act, or somethin, ts, ts

CamfromToronto
CamfromToronto

I can't imagine this is accepted currency in the Hicks household...

DeathProof
DeathProof

My job has been paying me in tide for months! My buddy traded a hooker a bottle of Tide cut with Wisk for a BJ in AC last weekend.

DeathProof
DeathProof

There are friggin videos online of people stealing & selling it!

pipeloader
pipeloader

everytime he drinks out of that jug, i get skeeved out.  you know that beer is soapy

dirk_lance
dirk_lance

 @CamfromToronto i gotta think that hicks would trade any laundry/hygiene products for a pack of cigarettes...

bmqq316
bmqq316

Bet that beer has one hell of a head on it.